A phone-in caller’s Irish accent bamboozled presenters and created 2 minutes of comedy gold

David from Coleraine rang Talk TV to tell them about a near-death incident he’d experienced on a farm.

Listen to what happened.

25 years ago, he was nearly killed on a farm when he had an accident in his 35 Massey tractor, which was split in two – but the mudguard saved him. A lucky escape.

Except, that’s not what presenters Lizzie Cundy and Ash Gould heard. Here’s a reminder of their hilarious guesses.

AG: Two cattle came at you?
LC: Yes. They came at you – and they rolled on you …

AG: What happened with the cattle? How were you killed by cattle?
LC: No, they fell on him.

AG: What was that you just said – “Smashing two”?
LC: Two cattle smashed him in two.
AG: What – they came head to head and you were like a sandwich filling in the middle?
LC: Yes.

AG: What happened with the cattle, David, that nearly killed you? It’s quite simple. Did you get gored?

AG: I don’t know what you just said. You’re on a farm, right?
LC: And you’re wearing a mask.
AG: And you spooked the cattle?
LC: You were wearing a mask, you spooked the cattle.

AG: Why were you nearly killed by a cattle?
LC: Two cattle.
AG: It’s a very basic question.
LC: They squashed him. They fell on him. They’re heavy.

AG: Matthew Charter? Who the hell’s Matthew Charter
LC: Don’t bring him into it. He’s not here to defend himself.
AG: So, there’s no cattle?
LC: No, there was two cattle.
AG: No, he’s saying there wasn’t now.

LC: You had an accident on the road …
AG: So, you weren’t on the farm, you were on a road?
LC: So, there’s no farm, no cattle …
AG: You were on a road and you had a car accident and was nearly killed.

The accidental comedy gold landed well with tweeters, especially after it received this accolade.

These responses sum it up.

We’re with Martin Cruise on this one.

This proves that the Accidental Partridge award was completely appropriate.


This Irish radio quiz goes from bad to worse and it’s utterly hilarious and charming

Source Chuck Thomas Image Screengrab