Boris Johnson’s thinks ‘freeborn Britons’ should be allowed to burn Christmas trees in their hearths – 15 scorching responses
Boris Johnson is a man whose ability to fall on his feet should be the subject of a scientific study, so we can all enjoy a bit of the charmed life.
For example, having left the office of Prime Minister, and then Parliament, in disgrace, he was handed a cushy side job writing weekly columns for the Daily Mail for a reported £1 million a year.
His latest offering is the sort of thing usually ranted by a man resisting arrest while invoking Magna Carta.
See for yourself.
BORIS JOHNSON: Why can't every freeborn Briton burn his Christmas tree on Twelfth Night in his own hearth? https://t.co/0tNK2Dxm46 pic.twitter.com/O6r7oBmaAA
— Daily Mail Online (@MailOnline) January 5, 2024
The answer may not have been apparent to Johnson, but it was as clear as a blazing inferno to everybody else.
1.
Because ur Christmas tree is both dry (trunk & branches) & oily (needles), will burn very fast & very hot, likely start a chimney fire unless ur diligent with ur chimney sweeping , & strong chance of setting your house alight, u gurning poltroon. pic.twitter.com/F850iOHUC3
— Sarah Phelps (@PhelpsieSarah) January 6, 2024
2.
Oh I dunno maybe because not all Britons are male and own fireplaces?
Christ make it stop it’s so exhausting. pic.twitter.com/1koRLmdC55
— Brendan May (@bmay) January 5, 2024
2.
£10,000 a pop to write the laziest drivel I think I've ever read. Sounds dictated, in haste because he's getting chased on a deadline. pic.twitter.com/rrivrlWPRn
— Otto English (@Otto_English) January 5, 2024
3.
He's just phoning it in now. Buyer's remorse yet, DM? https://t.co/NTiEn0nFMX
— nick abbot (@NIAbbot) January 6, 2024
4.
Yes, this is complete rubbish from Boris Johnson. But that's not unusual. https://t.co/mxWi6R8PIK
— Jenny Jones (@GreenJennyJones) January 6, 2024
5.
WTF who the hell is a free born Briton?
What strange Juju is this?
Johnson writing about the dark pagan arts again pic.twitter.com/lfgJ4RwCth— Miss Haversham (@haversham_miss) January 5, 2024
6.
Truly the biggest problem the people of this country are facing. https://t.co/cOu28BLKjB
— Steve of the Bed (@Punished_Steve) January 6, 2024
7.
In a universe just slightly different than this one, Kirstie Allsopp and Boris Johnson are watching their Christmas tree burn in the hearth of their detached Jacobean mansion, as is their bloody right as free born English people.
— Rob Bingham (@robbingham) January 5, 2024
8.
It's just noises at this point, isn't it? Surely ChatGPT can do these by now? https://t.co/aCGF0BQFf4
— Adam squires (@adsquires) January 5, 2024
9.
‘Today I is asking why every freeborn Briton can’t burn his Christmas tree on twelfth night in his own hearth’ pic.twitter.com/YExbmnBN2x
— Toby Earle Threads tobyontv (@TobyonTV) January 5, 2024
10.
Boris Johnsons latest column for the Mail-can you burn your own Christmas Tree-wow how much is he paid for this shitehttps://t.co/6YSdt3Q0fC
— Barbara (@BarbaraSutton15) January 6, 2024
11.
Is the answer because we don’t live in the Middle Ages and most people have them fires that’s just an orange light and some fake coals? x pic.twitter.com/C6rpfPng5l
— Buckers (@deathofbuckley) January 6, 2024
12.
Why can't every freeborn Briton afford a Christmas tree, a hearth, or a roof over their head?
I think we know the answer to that one, don't we Boris? https://t.co/qhXr2badmG— Brexit Pirates (@BrexitPirates) January 5, 2024
13.
JOHNSON: “It’s the right of every freeborn Briton to set their home ablaze”
FIRE BRIGADE: “Wood from Christmas trees can produce a substantial amount of flammable creosote. If this rises up the chimney, deposits could ignite & cause flames to spread up the chimney & to the roof” https://t.co/z10o1UKkcW pic.twitter.com/qN86wjUEO7
— Stefan Simanowitz (@StefSimanowitz) January 6, 2024
14.
WTF is he on about? ‘Freeborn Briton’? Burning your Christmas trees in your own hearths? What sort of fool is this sh*t aimed at? Utterly parodic. pic.twitter.com/hykSvAlRPg
— Neil Franklin (@NeilFra97674870) January 5, 2024
15.
Has a newspaper column ever been nominated for a Darwin Award?
How many of his gullible fans will try to burn their Christmas tree this weekend to prove that they are “freeborn Englishmen” and end up with a chimney fire (or worse)? https://t.co/T8NW1AWYTx— Sara-endipidy #FBPE (@sara_endipidy) January 6, 2024
Another part of the article had people pinching themselves.
You are going to need a drink for this one.
In Johnson's long-winded column about the right to burn your Christmas tree he describes himself as a "stickler" for truth and accuracy… https://t.co/YEbZDB8Yif
— Best for Britain (@BestForBritain) January 6, 2024
But this really was the icing on the Christmas cake.
Because you prohibited it, you specious twatwaffle. https://t.co/04iE4bvOpu pic.twitter.com/1fxiNeoVn2
— Paul Grimshaw (@PaulGrimshaw15) January 5, 2024
READ MORE
Boris Johnson has written his first Daily Mail column and the reviews are in! 17 must-read verdicts
Source Daily Mail Image pvproductions on Freepik
