Pics p.279

The headline is “my breasts won’t stop growing” but what makes it, is his face

Villagers burn BT van effigy in Bonfire Night protest over slow wi-fi

Some harsh reality outside a pet shop

Newsweek’s latest cover isn’t mucking about

If you want to see an impressively filthy house pre the council clear out then you’ve come to the right place

Tesco didn’t get the memo about what happens with alphabet products

The final line of this Liam Gallagher anecdote is the best thing you will read today

5 career paths you may not have considered

Clearly not everyone was feeling the Halloween spirit last night

A reminder that the 80s was a bad time to be drunk in a bathroom

‘My lecturer’s disappointed no-one has reported him to the Daily Mail’

An excellent minimal Donald Trump Halloween costume

Journalist: “Is it firsthand or first hand?” Editor: “Either one is fine.”

People are sharing diagrams of where to stroke their pets and it’s purrfect

‘Most men can’t find stair 1 roof access’