News p.134

The age of the Travelling Wilburys in 1988 will make you realise life is short and you’d better get a move on

6 responses to make you feel better about the Doomsday Clock ticking closer to midnight

Meet the new manager of the England women’s football team, Phil Neville

People want to buy Katie Hopkins £1m home and give it to asylum seekers

People are sharing “Stupid Things Couples Fight About” and it’ll make you say “this is us”

Brexit to shrink Digestives by 7 per pack and nothing is worth living anymore

What are the worst words in the English language?

This Reddit post about a guy who can hear his neighbours having sex is a “rollercoaster ride from beginning to the end”

Porn star describes Donald Trump as ‘a complete gentleman’ and the bar is set high for 2018

S Club 7 bloke sells Brit award and everyone feels really, really old

Gary Lineker had the perfect comeback to Donald Trump’s ‘shithole countries’ quote

Headline of the day

Michael Wolff’s legal letter to Donald Trump is unfailingly polite and utterly devastating

The rules for contestants on Countdown have gone viral because they show how hilariously pedantic the audience is

The Government rejects petition to get Blue Peter to design a new British passport