Pics p.385

12 year old writes amusing flowchart to keep people out of her bedroom

Best Christmas Movie-related DIY bauble we’ve seen this year

Dog chooses the perfect spot on a blanket for a snooze

This woman is single and has sent a brilliantly deceiving Christmas card

9 signs that’ll make you think “people are too stupid to live, just let humanity die now”

15 excellent dogs rated by the superb WeRateDogs™

This cartoon in the New Scientist nails everything about our upside-down priorities & social media

“When giraffes go to work do you think they put the tie at the top or bottom of their necks?”

“I’ve got a really important presentation on Monday and a story to write, so I built a cardboard theatre for my cat.”

This clipping from the Metro features the wankiest writing about beer you can imagine

8 non-festive films made Christmassy

Superb letter in the FT in which an Italian reader uses Boris Johnson to understand the difference between cake and pie

28 British jokes from Victorian times that’ll make your stiff upper lip curl into a smile

Amusing UKIP newspaper

If “Star Wars: Rogue One” posters were based upon idiotic comments from the Daily Mail