‘AITA for borrowing my husband’s work laptop without permission since I bought it for him?’

Someone with the wisely anonymous Reddit name u/Fannest43 headed to the r/AmITheAsshole? forum to ask about this incident.

AITA for borrowing my husband’s work laptop without permission since I bought it for him?

This was their story

Yesterday, I had issues logging in to my facebook account on my computer and went to borrow my husband’s laptop to see if I could log in from there. The laptop was in his bag and he left for work shortly after.

Later I got an angry call from him asking where his laptop was. I said I borrowed it to check my facebook log in but he ranted about how I caused him grief at work by taking it without even asking.

I reminded him of who bought this laptop to begin with but he said it was supposed to be a gift from me. True, I felt sorry for him and wanted to get him a proper laptop for work but is it a bad thing?. He said still, I shouldn”t have taken it and that facebook log in issue was not an emergency.

He came home looking upset and avoided me. I thought he overreacted to this but he snapped and said it caused him shit at work.

It was Fannest43’s first post – under that name, at least – and we suspect it will be their last after reading these reactions. N.B. – YTA means ‘You’re the asshole’.

Doesn’t he understand that if you didn’t log into Facebook at that very second, you could have missed an important updates on your high school frenemy’s latest MLM venture or a humorous meme that you totally relate to or an notification that it’s the birthday of your mother’s neighbor’s dog walker? YTA.

Imagine having to say to your boss “I’m really sorry that I have come to work without the proper equipment, but you need to understand that my wife just HAD to check FB? There could have been a FB emergency like a missing dog in a different country or an advert for metal posters!”

But not only a YTA for prioritising Facebook log-in stuff, but for going into his work bag and removing a laptop because you feel entitled to it. Don’t hold it over his head that you bought him a present. That’s such aggressively demeaning behaviour to not say “oh I’m sorry, I should’ve asked before borrowing it” LIKE A NORMAL ADULT but to say “well I bought it for you so I get to use it”. That’s really shitty. If you give someone something, you don’t get to claim priority.

Also, as a side note, if his work requires any NDAs for private projects, you’re really screwing it up by accessing the laptop. If my partner went into my work bag and started using my work laptop I’d be PISSED. YTA hugely.

I just absolutely HATE the fact she seems to think buying it for him as a gift basically makes it HER laptop as much as his. If this is your life philosophy, please just don’t buy me gifts at all.

I’m sure OP was dealing with one of those important international welfare situations, where you have to share the post to prove you care about cancer.

“Why are you so mad? I only took the one thing you need for your job which is the only way you make money, plus I just HAD to check Facebook for the latest news: I found a potato with a smile! Isn’t that exciting?”

Are you serious? YTA. It’s his laptop and you took it without asking for logging into Facebook?! Please apologize to the poor guy 😳

Wow, someone who thinks Facebook is more important than a job. YTA.

Lol what? Of course YTA. Are you 12?

u/ThelmaHorseDog went a little deeper.

YTA but not only for the reason above.

Why did you not say ‘hey sweetheart don’t leave yet I’ve got your laptop here’.

Like you knew you’d taken it out of the bag and had it and then you watched him leave for work not only without the laptop but with an empty bag. You knew full well he assumed he had it and you couldn’t spare 1 second to stop and let him know?

You’ve probably already guessed that Reddit voted that this person is the asshole. In fact, at the time of writing not a single person has voted in their favour – and we’re not surprised.

Somebody should reach out with a friendly ‘U ok hun?’


An obnoxious tourist kicked off over dogs in cafés and the internet dubbed them ‘the asshole’

Source r/AmITheAsshole Image Janeb13 on Pixabay