25 Favourite Funny Tweets of the Week
After a disappointingly bank holiday-free week, what could be better than the perfect excuse to have five minutes to yourself with a cuppa (other beverages are available) and a few laughs?
You put the kettle on, we’ll bring the laughs.
1.
F#% me, that wordle looks solid. pic.twitter.com/txOPcyfsaU
— Ignacio Lopez (@comedylopez) April 6, 2024
2.
If Shakespeare had had an editor pic.twitter.com/hZXeVvxMeg
— Thinkwert (@Thinkwert) April 7, 2024
3.
Worth remembering that if you have a relentless hacking cough you can go to your GP, rather than the Theatre
— Frankie Boyle Updates (@frankieboyle) April 8, 2024
4.
hang on, sorry… you want £50 for your 'kallax' storage unit, which is clearly damaged, which i'd have to drive to your house in croydon and personally dissemble myself, and which i can get delivered new from ikea for £40? no i'm not a 'timewaster', i'm just trying to understand pic.twitter.com/Py7ocAXIBp
— Stan's Account (@tristandross) April 10, 2024
5.
When the moon hits your knees
And you mispronounce trees
Sycamore— Stone Cold Jane Austen (@AbbyHiggs) April 7, 2024
6.
Never, in the history of publishing, has so much human misery been created by one book. pic.twitter.com/4dEGv0gSZh
— Ron Manager Remembers Nottingham and Stuff (@ronmanagernottm) April 7, 2024
7.
over 65 weeks you can build your own pedro pascal (first issue £1.99, every subsequent issue £10.99, magazine publisher folds three issues before completion) pic.twitter.com/hJmmko1PsU
— Dan Douglas (@dandouglas) April 7, 2024
8.
Half an orange on your cats head makes a great budget Eye Of Sauron. pic.twitter.com/jw3pOwGAdO
— Myusernameisfartoolongtobepractical (@FarUser) April 7, 2024
9.
Pasting anything into a neatly formatted Word document. pic.twitter.com/7GQPjqAbFe
— Andrew James Sillett (@andrewsillett) April 7, 2024
10.
After a lot of speculation I’m pleased to say that I’ve renewed my garden waste permit with North Warwickshire County Council for another 12 months. Nice to put the rumours to bed and just focus on my mowing now. Thanks for you of your messages
— Josh Pugh (@JoshPughComic) April 10, 2024
11.
Win, lose or draw. Don't care. Saw my dad get stuck in a turnstile so all worth it. pic.twitter.com/opC5gwsMfj
— James (@Jamesb17_) April 7, 2024
12.
japanese horror: the house is makes you kill yourself
american horror: the house kills you if you have sex
french horror: the house kills you by having sex with you
uk horror: Reece Shearsmith lives in the house and is weird— stuart (@punished_stu) April 10, 2024
