‘What’s a red flag employers try to pass off as a benefit?’ – 17 workplace warning signs to look out for

The corporate world is full of bizarre jargon. If you’re not putting a pin in synergising workflow, you’re probably doing some blue sky thinking to move the needle on your KPIs.

But the nonsense isn’t confined to the grind of doing actual work. Even so-called benefits get wrapped up in officespeak. To clue you in to the worst offenders, spectrecult put the following question to r/AskReddit:

‘What is a “corporate red flag” that employers try to pass off as a great benefit?’

Here are the top replies to run up the flagpole…

1.

‘”Unlimited earning potential through commission”

‘Yeah you’re going to find ways to screw me out of paying commission. Either you’ll change the rates it’s earned at, maybe you’ll say I only get it if I hit an almost unattainable KPI. Tell me what the median employee in the role earns through commission each month.’
-chalk_in_boots

2.

‘”We’re a family!”… Meaning you’re expected to work free overtime, and take part in 2-hour long team-building exercises weekly in your free time, but they have a foosball table somewhere… and you’ll probably get fired if you spend too much there.

‘Seriously, if you hear that… RUN. Don’t walk, just RUN.’
-West-Forever8365

3.

‘“Unlimited” vacation days’
-Numerous_Working_631

4.

‘“Fast paced environment” = we burn everyone out, and think it’s ok!’
-Blondebitchtits

5.

‘”We work hard and play hard.”

‘In my experience it means you’ll be constantly overworked and stressed and expected to go down to the bar at the end of the week with your coworkers and drink away half your paycheck to numb the pain.’
-Gr8NonSequitur

6.

‘Anonymous surveys are absolutely NEVER anonymous’
-zerotime2sleep

7.

‘Any “go-getter” type language (jump in feet first, etc.). It usually just means they aren’t going to train you, and they expect you to just figure it out.’
-Aggresive-Irreverent

8.

‘When they list statutory benefits like the minimum amount of annual leave, ie: the bare fucking minimum.

‘If you can’t offer superior benefits to retain staff, you’re not a company, you’re a soulless corporation that is engaging in extractive capitalism… avoid avoid avoid.’
-Just-Assumption-2915

9.

‘Catered lunch daily. Saves money but it implies that they don’t expect you to leave for lunch, or take a long break.’
-Char10