The reviews are in and the new Cats film is rubbing people up the wrong way
The film adaptation of Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber’s hit musical, CATS!, hasn’t exactly been the subject of high expectations, with both trailers being almost universally panned. Even with that caveat, the reviews are not good – not good at all.
Glad to report that Cats is everything you’d hoped for and more: a mesmerisingly ugly fiasco that makes you feel like your brain is being eaten by a parasite. A viewing experience so stressful that it honestly brought on a migraine.
— Robbie Collin (@robbiereviews) December 19, 2019
Here we go https://t.co/VR6AzDzkkD
— Anita Singh (@anitathetweeter) December 19, 2019
Some highlights, or lowlights, of the Telegraph‘s zero-star review include:
“the only realistic way to fix Cats would be to spay it,”
“What worked in the round off Drury Lane in 1981 – a suspension of disbelief, with the whole cast pirouetting in cat-suits – has been converted into a computer-aided hellscape so off-putting you may suspect eye failure.”
“Plot, too, can’t come to the rescue, because T.S. Eliot’s source poems didn’t provide one.”
Other scathing put-downs include these:
Your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not Jellicles can and Jellicles do, they didn't stop to think if Jellicles should.
— Guy Lodge (@GuyLodge) 19 December 2019
True story: I got home after seeing CATS and couldn’t look my own cat in the face for a good hour or two
— jen yamato (@jenyamato) 19 December 2019
I love bizzaro, crazy, break into song & dance stuff & #CATSMovie was easily the most boring thing I've ever seen. Dancing was good & Jennifer Hudson's "Memory" was stunning but I coulda easily napped & been fine. I spent a lot of time wondering what drugs Hooper was on.
— Yolanda Machado (@SassyMamainLA) 19 December 2019