25 wonderfully funny things from this week
Between the polar vortex, Theresa May going to beg for something she’s been told she can’t have and the news that Unilever is stockpiling ice-creams, it’s been a strange old week. What we all need now is a takeaway and a laugh. We can’t help with the takeaway, but we can help with the laugh. Just twenty-five of the funniest tweets we’ve seen this week – help yourself.
1.
Found something new to say when I leave a room. pic.twitter.com/FzkCVjuQBn
— Rich Neville (@RichNeville) January 31, 2019
2.
https://twitter.com/Pschlarm/status/1089651169461334016
3.
If Trump really wanted to see Hillary locked up, he should’ve just hired her to work on his campaign.
— LEGATE (@williamlegate) January 25, 2019
4.
https://twitter.com/MissSassy_Pants/status/1090287493566681089
5.
middle school me underlining the words "My Journal" in a notebook I would never open again pic.twitter.com/Hokqj6TKW7
— Sabrina Imbler (@aznfusion) January 29, 2019
6.
#DailyDoseOfDadJokesPart5 pic.twitter.com/CfjBh2uYmi
— Mark Hamill (@HamillHimself) January 30, 2019
7.
I’d be a terrible coroner. My reports would say something like: Subject is 44yo male. Cause of death, asphyxiation. Nice jaw. One unruly eyebrow. Strong hands. Excellent manscaping. We probably would have been great friends, possibly lovers. 8/10 stars.
— Katie Didn't (@Pork_Chop_Hair) January 27, 2019
8.
me: nice earrings
him: for the last time they're Air Pods
— Pru (@prufrockluvsong) January 28, 2019
9.
I took a personality test, and the result was just a picture of a dumpster.
— ficklenuts (@ficklenuts) January 31, 2019
10.
https://twitter.com/_sodapup/status/1090040681182031873
11.
https://twitter.com/matociquala/status/1090970374848897024
12.
Can't wait till January is over and we can stop hearing about people's impressive lifestyle changes.
— Mark Watson (@watsoncomedian) January 29, 2019