These 6 times Louis Theroux interviewed ‘Scottish Twitter’ are almost as good as the real thing
We’re grateful to author Ross Sayers for these exchanges between Louis Theroux and ‘Scottish Twitter’ which are almost as good as the real thing.
1.
[louis theroux: inside scottish twitter]
louis: your friend ally was hit by a bus, how did you react?
man: told him to fuck off
louis: didn't you think that was cruel? he's your friend
man: *shrugs*
louis: *voiceover* i was getting nowhere. i had to speak to ally himself.
— Ross Sayers (@Sayers33) October 7, 2019
2.
louis: so it was a fence
man: aye
louis: not a bank machine
man: naw, no a bonk machine
louis: *voiceover* his pronunciation of the word ‘bank’ as ‘bonk’ confused me, but i wanted to keep on his good side
— Ross Sayers (@Sayers33) October 7, 2019
3.
louis: do you still speak to her?
woman: no
louis: so you think it was her who…didn’t flush the toilet?
woman: *glares*
louis: *voiceover* she was angry but i wanted the truth
louis: could you sing cher lloyd for me
— Ross Sayers (@Sayers33) October 7, 2019
4.
louis: did you regret it? touching the dog’s penis?
man: i only touched the end ae it
louis: so is that a no?
man: i only touched the end ae it
louis: *voiceover* it was clear, like the dog’s ‘wee boaby’, we had reached the end of our chat
— Ross Sayers (@Sayers33) October 7, 2019
5.
louis: what did you think? when you saw the trampoline blowing through the garden?
man: i just thought…trampoline…trampoline..ken whit i mean?
louis: *voiceover* in a strange way, i did know what he meant
— Ross Sayers (@Sayers33) October 7, 2019
6.
louis: is there a chance you could be wrong?
woman: no
louis: not even a chance?
woman: no…we just have taxis
Louis: *voiceover* our production team had tried in vain for 3 hours to find an uber in dundee, but we hadn’t given up hope yet
— Ross Sayers (@Sayers33) October 7, 2019
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