This American’s hilarious thread about weird British traits went viral because she knows us so well
12.
90% of all public conflicts here are queue related. The other more serious 10% are about football or having the right shoes to get into a club.
— Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose) February 4, 2021
13.
People get full on arguing mad about the order you assemble breakfast items (when you put milk in when making tea or what you put first on a scone) and it does not matter at all.
— Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose) February 4, 2021
14.
If you mention swans to a British person they’ll tell you swans will break your arm and nod knowingly. No other information will be forthcoming on the topic.
— Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose) February 4, 2021
15.
Old fashioned candy shops here sell sweets with actively threatening names. Troach drops. Acid drops. Army and Navy tablets. They all taste like sugared houseplants.
— Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose) February 4, 2021
16.
Bathroom sink faucets in the UK often have two separate taps for the hot and cold water.
Why?
Fuck you, that’s why.
— Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose) February 4, 2021
17.
If you mention a weird dream or nightmare, Britishes will ask if you ate a lot of cheese before going to bed.
— Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose) February 4, 2021
18.
Oh god, I almost forgot the round system for drinks.
On its surface, it’s a commonly used system where everyone takes turns buying drinks for everyone else in their group but there are a million complex subtleties that make it confusing and delightful.
— Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose) February 4, 2021
19.
If you and another person are waiting to be served at a bar, you must each claim that the other person was next in line to be served when approached by staff.
This process may involve several rounds of “No, you”s and is resolved via unknown means.
— Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose) February 4, 2021
Oh, sure! I’m from the states many years ago but lived in Japan before coming to the UK. I now live in Birmingham which I am firmly convinced is the nicest city in the world to live in. I work in tech and have very ugly cats.
And here are just a few of comments it prompted from people keen to add a few extras of their own.
been here 19 years (good Lord). The English are batshit insane violent nutters, but very polite about it. Love ’em. Married one. They’ll probably kill me in my sleep with the sword by the bedside, but it’ll be an accident.
— David Gerard 🐍👑 (@davidgerard) February 4, 2021
I concede most of these things. However:
Beans on toast is amazing, why would you say it is not good?! Are you doing it right? Butter the toast, beans on the toast, grated cheese on the beans. Delicious.
Also. A scone is NOT a breakfast item!— Sarah Knight (@scarerkite) February 4, 2021
May I add for your consideration: washing up bowls in the sink. Like, does your sink not hold water? Why do you need a separate plastic tub in there?
— Dr. Caitlin McMullin (@caitlinmcmullin) February 4, 2021
You still missed the weirdest thing of all.
Despite enormous evidence to the contrary, we think the ability to recite ancient Greek and Latin poems (rather than, say, understanding science or law or government) means you are probably going to be good at running the country.
— Tom Morris 🏳️🌈 (@tommorris) February 4, 2021
And the obsession with word “Tea”
Tea – famous drink
Tea – evening or late afternoon meal
Afternoon Tea – assorted sandwiches, cakes, and scones
Tea cake – small round bread with raisins
Tea time- just after work and before go to the pub
Tea spoon
Tea towel
Tea room— Luis 🇪🇺 🇵🇹🇬🇧 (@Luisfdacunha) February 4, 2021
Jessica my big one, still, after two+ decades, is:
Why is the dog’s DINNER bad but the dog’s BOLLOCKS are good?— Lee Randall (@randallwrites) February 4, 2021
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Simply 23 brilliant comebacks to make your day just a little bit better
Source Twitter @jesslynnrose Image Pixabay