24 of our favourite non-serious Bluesky reactions to Trump declassifying the JFK files
The assassination of John F. Kennedy (JFK) by Lee Harvey Oswald on 22nd November 1963 was described as ‘the shot heard around the world’. There’s also a non-zero chance that it’s the historical event that has generated the most conspiracy theories – and that’s saying a lot considering the moon landings are a thing.
So, it’s not surprising that people have been eagerly anticipating the declassification of the JFK files by the Trump administration, which finally happened on Wednesday.
MAGA posting all this shit that we have already known for years about the JFK assassination is the most predictable thing to happen today besides Putin manipulating Trump while his sycophants declare victory.
— Ron Filipkowski (@ronfilipkowski.bsky.social) March 19, 2025 at 1:50 AM
Many of the documents had already been made public by Joe Biden, and some are still redacted.
The MAGA regime literally released the same JFK files that President Biden released and then lied to the cult that it’s new material. MAGA lunatics are dumb AF and are played like fools.
— Ricky Davila (@therickydavila.bsky.social) March 19, 2025 at 2:53 AM
In fact, some of the redacted documents in the latest declassification have previously been released unredacted – and several social security numbers that should have been made private were on display for at least the first few hours.
Social Security numbers and other private information of more than 200 former congressional staffers and others were made public Tuesday in unredacted files related to the assassination of JFK. Many of these people are still alive and therefore now vulnerable to privacy theft and doxing
— Catherine Rampell (@crampell.bsky.social) March 20, 2025 at 1:02 AM
Some people suggested the declassification might be a distraction.
He's releasing the JFK files. Look for what he's trying to distract from. Like, I don't know, erasing minorities and women from Arlington National Cemetery websites.
— Sarah Wood (@sarahwood.bsky.social) March 19, 2025 at 1:59 PM
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Trump brags about ‘releasing’ JFK files like he’s unveiling some shocking truth
when in reality, it’s the same redacted docs we’ve already seen.
Just another distraction while his cronies cash in.
The con never stops.
#JFKFiles #SmokeAndMirrors #JFK
.
— Libra on Fire ⚖️ (@libraonfire.bsky.social) March 19, 2025 at 1:05 PM
Trump claims he released the JFK assassination records to usher in an era of transparency. Yet, we still haven't seen the medical records of his general health or those from the faux assassination. He released the JFK records to keep people from focusing on his fascism. Period.
— doctorhenryct.bsky.social (@doctorhenryct.bsky.social) March 19, 2025 at 11:59 AM
While the assassination was obviously a terrible event, it’s not social media’s way to take anything completely seriously, so we’ve gathered some of the funniest responses.
1.
WHOA the JFK files are CRAZY!!!!!!
— Sooz Kempner (@soozuk.bsky.social) March 19, 2025 at 3:57 PM
2.
The unclassified JFK files #JFK knew things
— Freddy van Dam (@freddyvandam.bsky.social) March 19, 2025 at 2:34 PM
3.
Would be incredible if the JFK files are released unmolested and it was somebody entirely else. The Harlem Globetrotters, at the direction of the York Peppermint Patty company, killed JFK.
— Tim Onion (@bencollins.bsky.social) March 19, 2025 at 1:29 AM
4.
Trump Releases Documents Showing That Hunter Biden Killed JFK
@borowitzreport.bsky.social— scha·den·freu·de (@blisterpearl.bsky.social) March 19, 2025 at 1:46 PM
5.
The JFK Files are finally out. He was shot.
— Dan Clyne (@danclyne.bsky.social) March 19, 2025 at 2:32 AM
6.
The JFK Files have been released, and you guessed it: vaxxed
— Bruce Arthur (@brucearthur.bsky.social) March 18, 2025 at 11:41 PM
7.
These jfk files are wild
— SKELLYTON (@pizzalawyer420.bsky.social) March 20, 2025 at 12:20 AM
8.
Looking forward to reading about how DEI killed JFK
www.reuters.com/legal/us-jus…
— Domestic Enemy Hat (@kenwhite.bsky.social) March 18, 2025 at 3:29 PM
9.
wow, they released the files and it turns out JFK was still alive until just a few years ago, living in an old folks home in rural Texas alongside Elvis Presley
— Robert Evans (the Only Robert Evans) (@iwriteok.bsky.social) March 19, 2025 at 5:04 AM
10.
Well well well. The JFK Files have confirmed what I’ve long suspected: a bird flew into him
— pixelatedboat aka “mr bluesky” (@pixelatedboat.bsky.social) March 19, 2025 at 2:53 AM
11.
i didn't expect the jfk files to be in the format of a choose your own adventure
— jenny_tightpants (@jtp.bsky.social) March 19, 2025 at 3:02 PM
12.
Browsing the JFK files and there’s some really damning stuff in here
— Matt Stocaí Bána (@stocaibana.bsky.social) March 19, 2025 at 3:21 PM