Trick or Treat? The Poke Survival Guide

Lifestyle: On Sunday night – hundreds of thousands of sugar-crazed gremlins will hit the UK’s streets seeking free confectionary and treats.

What happens if you are caught short without any sweeties and don’t want your tyres slashed or pets strung up?

With a small amount of preparation – here’s 10 ‘treats’ you can offer up as an alternative when they arrive at your doorstop.

1. Handover the business card of someone you hate. Say ‘call me in the morning I’d prefer to give you all some money’

2. Dishwasher pellets – ‘a Swedish delicacy – suck don’t chew’

3. Squeeze ketchup into some socks, add twigs and freeze – tah dah.. ‘vampire Callipos’

4. That Magic Tree air freshner in the car – coat in glue and scatter with sugar – ‘haunted forest lolly’

5. Oxo cubes – place on flat of palm – ‘right – who wants a giant cola cube?’

6. Handful of cornflakes rolled in marmite – ‘it’s Mexican chocolate – tastes a bit different’

7. Lemsip and Vim tipped into a piece of tin foil  – hey presto – Space Dust!

8. A free newspaper CD – cross out The Railway Children (or whatever it is) and stencil…  Bangin’ Grime Hitz

9. A black bin liner with two eye holes cut in it (Gucci ghost outfit).

10. Recycle a Tommy Copper classic – produce a teabag from wallet slip it into their top pocket, pat it and say ‘have a drink on me’.

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