Our 25 favourite jokes from this week
With two bank holidays in rapid succession, plus all the cheap chocolate in the shops after Easter, it’s been quite a good week for a lot of people, as long as they weren’t trying to commute across London, come to a Brexit agreement or mess with Jay Rayner.
None of those apply to these 25 people, who were obviously on very good form.
1.
Friend: What did your wife do just before she had the baby?
Me: She went "FUUUUUUUUCK!" and a bit of poo came out.
Friend: I meant work wise.
Me: oh, book keeping.
— Baby Jesus (@JCautomatic) April 24, 2019
2.
3.
4.
Just trying to read the Led Zeppelin wikipedia entry about when Jimmy went missing, but it says Page Not Found.
— Moose Allain Ꙭ (@MooseAllain) April 23, 2019
5.
My favourite childhood memory is not paying for anything
— Rach (@RachaelvsWorld) April 22, 2019
6.
Which idiot called it a swear jar and not a fuckit bucket
— Tom Chivers (@TomChivers) April 22, 2019
7.
https://twitter.com/horchataqween/status/1120468925052071938
8.
https://twitter.com/shyshybreezy/status/1120300970313965569
9.
did jk rowling write this https://t.co/rYLdVRxYQL
— David Mack (@davidmackau) April 23, 2019
10.
britain's three elite institutions pic.twitter.com/g1umKuhZKo
— Stan The Golden Boy (@tristandross) April 22, 2019
11.
https://twitter.com/JohnFugelsang/status/1121094867273355264
12.
https://twitter.com/sanaajatoi/status/1119243375411126274