15 political jokes to help you cope with all the general election news
9.
“A more moderate candidate would easily beat Johnson!” I cry, completely ignoring that Ed Miliband, a mild mannered policy dork, was treated like fucking chairman mao by half the press.
— Insincere Hemingway (@theatlasofworld) November 27, 2019
10.
“What were you told not to do?”
“Fuck with the NHS.”
“And what have you done?”
“Fucked with the NHS." pic.twitter.com/dFSwtgHqNQ
— Amanda (@Pandamoanimum) November 27, 2019
11.
Look, I'm not saying Boris Johnson is a chicken.
All I'm saying is on Page 462 of those NHS documents, the Americans make a formal request to have him chlorinated.#chickenjohnson #CowardlyJohnson
— Chris Henry #CorbynSavesChristmas (@Socialist_Chris) November 27, 2019
12.
There’s a rumour going round that Cummings has resigned. To spend more time with our data, presumably.
— Paul Bernal (@PaulbernalUK) November 27, 2019
13.
Me arriving to do my interview with Andrew Neil.#AndrewNeilInterview#chickenjohnson pic.twitter.com/uVhC7C8Pnd
— Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) November 27, 2019
14.
Johnson:
“Yes, I lied about the 40 hospitals and the 50000 nurses and the £350m a week and no border in the Irish Sea and October 31st and prorogation and Jennifer Arcuri and everything I’ve ever written or said but you can definitely trust me that the NHS is not for sale”— David Schneider (@davidschneider) November 27, 2019
15.
The Think, Tank! fact-finding trip to Mars went well. It's a patriot's paradise! Strict immigration controls, 100% budget spend on military-grade tech and no speed cameras. The only downside was the lack of 4g coverage (it was only 0.4g) but I'm carping, its a great planet: 7/10. pic.twitter.com/b9gGZGTGB0
— Mark ne-Francois-pas 🇬🇧 (@MarkFrancois12) November 27, 2019
Comedian and writer, Mark Steel shared a lot of people’s lack of faith in the scrutiny applied to the Prime Minister.
The Chinese Daily once reported Mao had swum ten miles of the Yangtze, in half the previous world record. The Conservatives should announce Boris Johnson has beaten Mao's record, as it would be reported as fact on the news, with no reporter asking why he wasn't even wet.
— Mark Steel (@mrmarksteel) November 28, 2019
We suspect Boris Johnson is more of a little black book than a Little Red Book kind of a guy.
Source: Twitter, Image: Twitter, Telegraph on YouTube
Read more: The 16 funniest jokes that are making the election campaign bearable
