Quarantine quips – our 17 favourites

10.

Can’t stay in bed all day, should get up and sit on the couch all day.

— Bethany Black (@BeffernieBlack) April 8, 2020

11.

Just popped over the road to see my elderly 86 year old neighbour to ask if she needed anything from Tesco. Luckily she did so I gave her my list. There’s no point in us both going really

— 🐝-List at Capital (@BListAtCapital) April 7, 2020

12.

Photo taken in my local park this afternoon. Absolutely fuming pic.twitter.com/jTRFPehdw7

— Sara (@tinyredbook) April 5, 2020

13.

‘Raab in Charge’ would be a good title for a 1980s sitcom, but not a 2020 news report. pic.twitter.com/DS48Cu8f4E

— Michael Moran (@TheMichaelMoran) April 7, 2020

14.

I liked it better when everything was precedented

— Danny Wallace 🇪🇺 (@dannywallace) April 7, 2020

15.

Very much enjoying all the ‘THE VIRUS DOESN’T DISCRIMINATE’ takes from the press and media, as though we were all previously possessed of the notion that it was floating around going, “Actually, you seem quite important. You know what, I’ll just infect one of the plebs instead.”

— 🏳️‍🌈 Max 🏳️‍🌈 (@SpillerOfTea) April 7, 2020

16.

what idiot called it ‘a letter from the prime minister’ and not borispondence

— Richard Cook (@cookywook) April 6, 2020

17.

I can’t believe the government are relying on models to forecast the pandemic, they should ask scientists instead, they’re not as pretty but they know a lot more.

— Gary Delaney (@GaryDelaney) April 8, 2020

READ MORE

19 of the best lockdown jokes to help us all stay positive

Image Robin Flavell