People have been sharing their five achievements last week, after Elon Musk ordered federal employees to do just that – 21 favourites
You’ve probably seen the post by Elon Musk, asking federal employees to list their achievements from the previous week – insisting that failure to comply would be taken as their resignation.
In case you haven’t, feast your eyes on this.
The resignation threat didn’t find its way into the email that duly arrived, almost certainly because it wasn’t legal. Furthermore, the Pentagon, State Department and FBI were all amongst many government agencies that told their workers to ignore the order, and not to send anything to Musk’s unsecure address.
During a press conference with the French President, Emmanuel Macron, Trump told reporters the thinking behind Musk’s email request.
Trump on DOGE Email asking federal employees to list five things they did last week: A lot of people are not answering because they don’t even exist pic.twitter.com/O67IyYmDXi
— Acyn (@Acyn) February 24, 2025
“A lot of people are not answering because they don’t even exist.”
There’s no way they could know that, but we fully expect it to appear in the next round of DOGE propaganda, alongside some BS such as how Teslas make the workforce eight times as efficient.
Over on Bluesky, Dave Levitan showed people the content of Musk’s message.
Here’s the email everyone is getting from OPM. Embarrassing stuff.
— Dave Levitan (@davelevitan.bsky.social) February 22, 2025 at 9:52 PM
And Aaron Fritschner took the opportunity to invite a little extra chaos into the mix.
The reply email inbox for this “what did you do last week” email is [email protected], so, you know, definitely don’t send them any unrelated messages that would interfere with their ability to carry out Elon’s dumbass bullshit
— Aaron Fritschner (@fritschner.bsky.social) February 22, 2025 at 10:18 PM
It prompted some Bluesky users to provide ‘their five bullet points’. Here are some of the best.
1.
1. Monday – fell apart
2. Tuesday – broke my heart
3. Wednesday – same
4. Thursday – didn't even start
5. Friday – I'm in love— Imani Gandy (@angryblacklady.bsky.social) February 22, 2025 at 10:53 PM
2.
#Emails2DOGE
1. My Job
2. My Job
3. My Job
4. My Job
5. My Job— Eggs and Rights (@eggsandrights.bsky.social) February 23, 2025 at 12:47 AM
3.
MY ACCOMPLISHMENTS THIS WEEK
1. Consciousness
2. Respiration
3. I petted several cats
4. Consumed pizza
5. Strategic AND tactical napping— John Scalzi (@scalzi.com) February 23, 2025 at 7:18 PM
4.
1. Woke up
2. Got out of bed
3. Dragged a comb across my head
4. Found my way downstairs and drank a cup
5. Looking up, I noticed I was late— Nothin’ but Blue Skies from now on (@bluesos.bsky.social) February 22, 2025 at 10:27 PM
5.
(1) I spoke directly to the mother of my children. Strangely, I refer to this woman as my wife
(2) I viewed pictures of my children without them being included in a legal complaint
(3) I played with my children (all of them)
(4) I did not commit any crimes
(5) I did not violate any court orders— Matt Gibbs (@gibbs52.bsky.social) February 22, 2025 at 11:32 PM
6.
* Classified
* Classified
* Classified
* Classified
* Wrote this stupid email— Ankle Megami Tensei (@stochasticooze.bsky.social) February 22, 2025 at 10:52 PM
7.
1) Harry Truman, Doris Day, Red China, Johnnie Ray
2) South Pacific, Walter Winchell, Joe DiMaggio
3) Joe McCarthy, Richard Nixon, Studebaker, television
4) North Korea, South Korea, Marilyn Monroe
5) Did not start a fire
— doitinprivate.bsky.social (@doitinprivate.bsky.social) February 23, 2025 at 12:00 PM
8.
1. Tumbled out of bed
2. Stumbled to the kitchen
3. Poured myself a cup of ambition
4. Yawned and stretched
5. Tried to come to life— Cass Morris (@cassmorriswrites.com) February 22, 2025 at 11:25 PM
9.
— ccorleyjd.bsky.social (@ccorleyjd.bsky.social) February 22, 2025 at 10:39 PM
10.
•Reported a phising email to security
•Reported a phising email to my supervisor
•Reported a phising email to my supervisor’s supervisor
•Reported a phising email to my supervisor’s supervisor’s supervisor
•Reported a phising email to my supervisor’s supervisor’s supervisor’s supervisor— Susie Crimmins (@scrimmins.bsky.social) February 22, 2025 at 10:13 PM
11.
1) I put my right foot in.
2) I put my left foot out.
3) I put my right foot in.
4) And I shook it all about.
5) Did the Hokey Pokey & I turned myself around.— Karen Dalton Beninato (@kbeninato.bsky.social) February 23, 2025 at 3:22 AM