Just a list of the most brutal and inventive insults from around the world
Whilst there’s no denying that a simple, one-word insult directed at someone who deserves it can be effective and satisfying, it’s always good when insults get a lot more creative.
Writer Adam Sharp has been sharing on Twitter his favourite insults from around the world and they’re often as brutal as they are inventive.
Let’s get stuck in.
1.
What's the most brutal insult you've ever heard in your language? I think the most savagely specific one that I've ever encountered was from Finnish… sun gradu oli varmaan 20 sivua. It means "your thesis was probably 20 pages long"
— Adam Sharp (@AdamCSharp) April 29, 2025
2.
The most savage insult from New Zealand (in my opinion) was a put-down from a 1949 parliamentary session, where one member said of another that "his brains could revolve inside a peanut shell for a thousand years without touching the sides."
— Adam Sharp (@AdamCSharp) April 29, 2025
3.
That insult was added to the list of "unparliamentary language," which is forbidden from being used in debates in New Zealand. It also includes "idle vapourings of a mind diseased" (1946), "Merv the Swerve" (1980) and "energy of a tired snail returning home from a funeral" (1963)
— Adam Sharp (@AdamCSharp) April 29, 2025
4.
Another savage parliamentary put-down, this time from Australia…
Winston Turnbull, from the Country Party (a real blow-hard) finished one of his waffles in parliament with "I'm a Country member."
Without pausing, Prime Minister Gough Whitlam responded, "yes, I remember."
— Adam Sharp (@AdamCSharp) April 29, 2025
5.
It's not directed at a specific person, but I've always been fond of this from the conductor Sir Thomas Beecham… "Brass bands are all very well in their place – outdoors and several miles away."
— Adam Sharp (@AdamCSharp) April 29, 2025
6.
And while we're on the subject of music, a Hungarian expression for commenting on the quality of someone’s singing is erotikus a hangod, bassza a fülem. It means “your voice is erotic, it fucks my ears”
— Adam Sharp (@AdamCSharp) April 29, 2025
7.
Another poetic Hungarian phrase, this time for commenting on someone's appearance, goes as follows… “if you went down a mine, the coal would come up by itself”
— Adam Sharp (@AdamCSharp) April 29, 2025
8.
Shakespeare also had some pretty brutal insults, including these five…
5. Thine face is not worth sunburning
4. Your brain is as dry as the remainder biscuit after voyage
3. Away, you three-inch fool
2. You, minion, are too saucy
1. I do desire that we may be better strangers— Adam Sharp (@AdamCSharp) April 29, 2025
9.
I've just learnt a poetic Welsh insult that goes mae dy bresenoldeb fel niwl: yn lledaenu diflastod ble bynnag ei cherdded. It means "your presence is like mist: spreading misery wherever it moves"
— Adam Sharp (@AdamCSharp) April 29, 2025