‘What did you ask your parents as a child, but didn’t realise was vulgar?’ – 21 completely innocent but NSFW questions and comments

12.

‘When I was younger, late elementary or early middle school, it was explained to me (by my brother and friend) that ‘eating her out’ was to take her to a nice restaurant. Well, my parents’ anniversary was coming up and I ask my dad, with my mom in the car and my brother and friend in the car, what they were doing for their anniversary.

My dad replies with ‘Oh, we’re going to go to a nice restaurant’, to which I replied ‘Oh, so you’re eating her out?’. My understanding of the phrase was corrected and my brother and friend looked like they were going to explode from holding in laughter. Jeffrey, Dan, you guys are dicks.’
–TheRiattAct

13.

‘Used to say Grand Pricks instead of Grand Prix.’
–Empty-Drummer-1486

14.

‘As a little kid my church bestie and I had a secret code that we would use to pass notes in church. She had a cat and I had two dogs so our code for pet was the head of a fish attached to the end of a bone. Take a moment to imagine what that would look like.

My mother went ballistic when she saw a note between us covered in penises.’
–PantsIsDown

15.

‘One day my friends gave me a tiny stuffed beaver as a gift. I was so excited, I ran home and told my dad I had a little beaver and asked him if he wanted to see it. He looked horrified.’
–ImpracticalHack

16.

‘When I was four, me and my family were at a pub having a meal. I needed to go to the toilet, so my grandpa took me. On the way out, I spotted a machine on the side of the wall.

‘Grandpa, what’s that?’

‘Ermm… it’s a condom machine.’

‘What’s a condom?’

‘It’s something that men… put things in.’

‘… can I have one?’

‘NO.’ And he rushed me out of the mens. When we get back to the table, I, being the little shit I was, yell at the top of my voice ‘MUM, GRANDPA WON’T BUY ME ANY CONDOMS!’.’
–thrown-away-1992

17.

‘When we would be driving we would pass our towns adult video store and I would remark how I couldn’t wait to be an adult because then i could go in there and see all the good movies. In my mind it had great adult movies like Terminator 2, The Road Warrior, and the like. My mom thought it was very funny but she has been kind enough to not bring it up.’
–hwatsgoingondale

18.

‘During a family game of UNO, my five-year-old looked at my wife and asked, ‘Do you know what ‘fuck’ means?’

My wife, a bit stunned replied, ‘What did you say?’

Without missing a beat, our 2-year-old piped up, ‘He said, ‘Do you know what ‘fuck’ means?”

20 years ago. Still haven’t stopped laughing.’
–Lesssuckmoreawesome

19.

‘Was playing Destroy All Humans 2. got the quest to anally probe 20 humans, went upstairs and asked my parents (in front of several of their friends they were hosting) what anal probing was. There were a lot of red faces and laughter.’
–Roger44477

20.

‘At a friend’s house watching 20,000 Leagues under the Sea I described the squid as having big testicles. Every adult in the room thought it was hilarious and I had no idea.’
–HuginnNotMuninn

21.

‘I once wrote a poem about a lonely man that lived on an asteroid and I named him Astro Semen. Turned it in at school. Nobody ever said a thing. I only realised it years later.’
–expandandincludeit

Source r/AskReddit Image Screenshot