‘What’s the silliest thing you’ve overheard in public?’ – 23 comments from people who probably shouldn’t be allowed out on their own

13.

‘I once overheard two lads, who must have been on the bus coming back from their MENSA meeting, arguing about babies being born with hair. One of the lads was not having it, that babies could be born with hair.

“So you’re telling me there’s babies coming out with full heads of hair?…Allow it bruv…that’s BS’ was the line that stood out to me.’
–Practical_Golf_1179

14.

‘Just the other day, the strangers on the seat in front got into a conversation. A asked B for directions to a certain local hospital, and B said ‘Oh, I wouldn’t start from here’.’
–SnooDonuts6494

15.

‘A lass was on the phone to her mum discussing her STD results, everyone on the bus had very awkward expressions on their faces, I had to go sit upstairs because I couldn’t stop laughing.’
–dinkidoo7693

16.

‘Hopefully a plane might do instead of a bus? I was on a plane to Budapest with my wife. Behind me was a load of guys on a stag do. They were very well behaved. So the plane lands in Budapest, guy sat behind me, who’s looking out of the plane window, ‘There’s a bloke down there with a pair of shorts on and a hi-vis vest?’. His mate says ‘Well, he will have, it’s gonna be warm outside’.

‘Bloke looking out of window, ‘What?’ His mate tells him the weather forecast said it’s gonna be really warm. Window guy says ‘I’ve brought jumpers and warm clothes, so, hang on… Hungary isn’t near Russia?’ Cue his mates pissing themselves! It was around 34°C the whole weekend.’
–Carlomahone

17.

‘My dearly departed 80 year old MIL once said in a totally (not meant to be) homophobic way, that she didn’t like those gays because they ‘put the Willie’s up her’.

‘It took me about half an hour to stop laughing and explain to my ex and her sisters what their delightful mother had said.’
–StuartHunt

18.

‘On a bus. A guy in his 30’s giving his card details whilst talking on his mobile phone.’
–Stargazer86F

19.

‘I was on a train that was stopped for ages between stations. Eventually there was an announcement that there’d been a suicide on the tracks (in more indirect language) and we had to turn back…at which point a woman huffed very loudly ‘Could my day get ANY worse?’.’
–Weird_Win1505

20.

‘The bus was parked outside the entrance to the train station.

‘Passenger: ‘Does this bus go any closer to the station?’

‘Bus driver: “No, unless you want me to drive on to the platform, missus.”
–valentia11

21.

‘Heard in the mid 90s: ‘Hitler’s put the cause of the far right back 50 years’.’
–Virtual-Mobile-7878

22.

‘On the bus, passing a Vidal Sassoon hairdresser.

One lady to another: ‘Vidal Sassoon, wasn’t he a writer?’

The other lady: ‘No dear, he’s a politician in America!”
–TranslatorCritical11

23.

‘That Beyoncé Knowles is related to Nick Knowles from DIY SOS.’
–Significant_Return_2

Source r/AskUK Image Screenshot