This thread will strike a chord with anyone who has ever filled out a tax return online
This goes out to anyone who has just filled out – or has ever filled out – a tax return online.
We don’t know @JBwol but we’re guessing he – or she – has filled out one or two in their lifetime. Almost makes you pine for the days of paper returns. Almost.
1.
https://twitter.com/JBwol/status/957252002584711168
2.
We couldn't identify you.
Your first girlfriend's mother's maiden name
Capital of Belarus
King Arthur's burial coordinates
Last three letters of your father in law's number plate
Your inner-most fear
7523/42*3.5
Your provisional driving license expiry date
— JB (@JBwol) January 27, 2018
3.
You answered all of those correctly.
We still don't recognise you.
A letter containing a government code that relates to none of the above will arrive by boat in 12 to 14 weeks.
— JB (@JBwol) January 27, 2018
4.
Thank you for using HRMC online. We value your feedback. Please stand outside your back door any howl a number between 1 and 10 at the moon.
— JB (@JBwol) January 27, 2018
Nailed it, prompting a whole host of people to share similar horror stories.
Your memorable place? Must contain upper case, numbers and a dash…. Then its not fucking memorable is it!!!!!
— Bubbs (@bubble334170) January 27, 2018
Welcome to HRMC online
Please enter your login
Enter your Gateway ID
Password please
User ID
Govt ID please
Enter a code we've texted to you
Keep waiting
We’ve sent, I swear
No, really we have.
[ping]
[enter the number]
Your session has timed out; please start over
— Shouty Person ❄️️ (@clacksee) January 27, 2018
If you’re experiencing difficulties, please click on the link below to open a chat window.
HMRC chat: we’re sorry; this service is offline
— Shouty Person ❄️️ (@clacksee) January 27, 2018
Even better you can call up and be put on hold for 30 minutes before the system lobs you off and records it as an answered call for HMRCs stats. Only if you hang up before then does it get logged as an unanswered call!
— Stuart Clark (@StuartClark30) January 27, 2018
Then after ten attempts to get through, they ask if you’ve looked at their online help section? Ffs!
— Lyndsey (@GiggleLyndsey) January 28, 2018
My Falling Down moment is fast approaching.
— JB (@JBwol) January 27, 2018
— Weem (@weeemrcb) January 28, 2018
Except some people seemed to think it was nothing to do with the hell of HMRC’s online system but that it could be, you know, human error. Clearly never done self-assessment.
Get organised!
— Pedro Gonzalez (@PedroGo64657215) January 28, 2018
I am organised. What aspect of this tweet leads you to think I gave an issue with organisation?
— JB (@JBwol) January 28, 2018
Old phone.
— Pedro Gonzalez (@PedroGo64657215) January 28, 2018
So, I filed it fine in the end. The security process is outdated, slow, unclear, bureaucratic and annoying. Some of the items in my list aren't true, and are used for exaggerated comic effect to make the point above. There is no old phone.
— JB (@JBwol) January 29, 2018
We feel your pain.
And if you don’t think it can possibly be that difficult.
There’s genuinely a point at which I was instructed to ‘select yes to select no’.
— Bryan Eccleshall (@eccleshall1965) January 27, 2018
Here's the message I got that slowed me down when doing my tax return… pic.twitter.com/cUAiq7uYXu
— Bryan Eccleshall (@eccleshall1965) January 28, 2018