You literally won’t believe the talents of Nick Harvey’s two-year-old daughter
Some of those internet trolls you might have heard about made some awful comments …
About the quality of her work:
That’s the worst duck I’ve ever seen! It’s beak’s shit, and it looks like a bastard.
— Neil (@_Enanem_) February 24, 2019
Easy to make one lying down, you don't have to bother with the legs. Lazy if you ask me.
— darren white (@whitebelvoir) February 25, 2019
Has the idiot even seen a duck?
— Neil (@_Enanem_) February 25, 2019
About her unusual name:
I can’t believe that people are hounding your daughter.
— Mr Roger Quimbly (@RogerQuimbly) February 24, 2019
Like I said, so quick to joke.
Please don’t mock her name. My wife and I have been teased mercilessly for the past 27 months by friends, family and strangers. We’ve tried to rise above it, but occasionally it hurts. Please be kind.
— Nick Harvey (@mrnickharvey) February 24, 2019
And – incredibly – about whether Baskerville had actually created the pieces shared by her devoted father:
— Leo (@leowatkins) February 24, 2019
I’m gonna stick my neck out and say I don’t believe you!
— TW (@TonyW_132) February 25, 2019
By the whole of this morning, do you mean travelled back in time? Come on dude. Let's not bullshit. We all have the ability to Google…
— Gav jenks (@bassjebgav) February 25, 2019
Which, of course, was nonsense.
What? Nick is as trustworthy as the day is long.
— Alistair Coleman (@alistaircoleman) February 24, 2019
Can't believe the cynicism here. Heartbreaking. There should be a Snopes page dedicated to proving Baskerville's talents.
— GrantJRobson (@grantjrobson) February 25, 2019
As incredible as her fine motor skills obviously are, they’re nothing compared to her grasp of the pressing matters of our time, such as:
Climate change.
“Another lovely day,” I say cheerfully to Baskerville, my two year old.
She puts down her book.
“I like the sun as much as anyone, but after 2018’s unprecedented heatwave and January’s deadly temperatures in Australia, our perception of what’s normal is shifting,” she replies.
— Nick Harvey (@mrnickharvey) February 26, 2019
The Prime Minister playing to the gallery.
On overhearing Theresa May say ‘simples’, my two year old, Baskerville, spat out her dummy and unleashed an ear-piercing scream.
She was visibly traumatised.
“The dumbing down of politics is too much to bear,” she said, choking back tears. “Attlee must be turning in his grave.”
— Nick Harvey (@mrnickharvey) February 26, 2019
Political Twitter intrigues.
I just woke up my two year old, Baskerville, to tell her about Rachael Swindon’s suspension.
“Rachael was a man masquerading as woman,” she replied nonchalantly. “Good riddance to him.”
— Nick Harvey (@mrnickharvey) March 4, 2019
Damaging incompetence in government.
My two year old, Baskerville, just woke up crying.
“Chris Grayling is, without doubt, the most inept minister in my lifetime,” she spluttered. “How is he still in a job?”
Before I had time to reply, she had fallen asleep again. God, I love her.
— Nick Harvey (@mrnickharvey) March 5, 2019
And the latest embarrassing incident from the political sphere.
Baskerville, my two year old, just fell out of bed. Understandably, she was really upset.
As I gently tucked her back in, she stopped crying, hugged me tighter than I have ever been hugged before, and whispered, “Amber Rudd, eh? What’s all that about? Fucking Tories.”
— Nick Harvey (@mrnickharvey) March 7, 2019
Twitter user @Acelliott79 made a comment that can’t have been far from all our minds.
I’m looking forward to when she works out gene splicing and comes up with a way to harness the power of giraffes and humans. I reckon a couple more years and that white paper will be ready to go.
— Andrew Elliott (Bobson D) (@Acelliott79) February 25, 2019
We would love to have captured a photo of the mini marvel, but every time we tried, she was hidden behind a giraffe.
And if you believe that, you’ll believe anything that’s written on the side of a bus.
Painting 1: Nicole Angell
Painting 2: pngtree.eu
Sculpture: legatostroke
Topiary: Frank Edwards
Giraffe dog: Pinterest
