Esther McVey compared Boris Johnson to a panda and these are the only replies you need

John Plunkett. Updated October 6th, 2019

Esther McVey – not entirely a stranger to these pages – has been Esther McVeying again with this interview in the Times in which she compared so-called prime minister Boris Johnson to a panda.

And the – Google, Google – housing minister meant it in a good way.

https://twitter.com/EstherMcVey1/status/1180436161929662464

‘Boris is a panda 🐼 he has the energy and tornado personality needed to reconnect with working voters let down by the London-centric Labour Party.’

If you’re wondering if a panda analogy isn’t quite the correct one, then you’d probably be right. Here are our favourite things people said about it.

Pandas are renowned for their lack of energy and their docile personality. This is literally the worst metaphor ever. https://t.co/CpZk8Q9zYu

— Keir Shiels (@keirshiels) October 5, 2019

They are on the verge of extinction and are so incredibly lazy, they barely shag, but ok

— •• (@agirlcalledlina) 5 October 2019

I have watched panda videos, I know panda videos, panda videos are friends of mine

Esther, Boris is no panda https://t.co/aFgzpqTCtP

— David Allen Green (@davidallengreen) October 5, 2019

Pandas do not have energy, nor do they have 'tornado personalities'. They also have to be coerced into sex/reproduction, which doesn't appear to affect Boris. Furthermore, were it not for human sentimentality, they would probably be extinct. In short, they're nature's simpletons https://t.co/XIlyl24T8T

— Richard Littler (@richard_littler) October 5, 2019

Don’t agree with Esther often but Boris-Panda is bang on:

“After mating, the male panda leaves the female alone to raise the cub.”

— Frank Cottrell-Boyce (@frankcottrell_b) 5 October 2019

Esther "David Attenborough" Mcvey, here, using an animal famous for its lack of energy to describe Tornado Johnson. P. S. Pandas are notoriously reluctant to shag, so that's 0 for 2. https://t.co/O5cmdxzHQF

— Oonagh (@Okeating) October 5, 2019

Good analogy.

Panda's eat, shoots and leaves.

— Wolfie. #EL4C (@Tpopularfront) 5 October 2019

He's a short dicked twat who should be extinct and he's here to bamboo-zle us kill me now. https://t.co/NESEo5RdHm

— David Quantick (@quantick) October 5, 2019

A panda's daily diet consists almost entirely of various bamboos. They eat between 20 and 30 pounds of bamboo a day. Consequently, they also defecate up to 40 times a day. If you equate Johnson's speech to a Pandas excrement, then yes Johnson is a Panda

— sue#NHSLove (@SueSuezep) 5 October 2019

10.

Trying hard to remember the last time anybody in the history of language itself associated the phrases "a panda" and "energy and tornado personality" https://t.co/gml23zG3hh

— we wish you a merry katie (@supermathskid) October 5, 2019

To sum up …

How on Earth did you become a government minister? I mean, honestly. What is this nonsensical bilge?

There can't have been any form of aptitude test. https://t.co/Z1PSQ2Q5Gi

— Graham Lithgow (@grahamlithgow) October 5, 2019