RFK Jr says ‘our parents aren’t having children’ because teenage sperm count is half that of a 65-year-old, so they’re making America fertile again
In ‘things we’d rather not think about without mind bleach’, Donald Trump and RFK Jr have turned their attention to making America fertile again – and we don’t mean lush wheat fields.
As part of his regime’s efforts to raise the birth rate, he is urging US employers to include generous benefit packages to cover IVF treatment, and he allowed the brainworm-in chief to step up and explain why they think it’s necessary.
RFK Jr: "Today the average teenager in this country has 50% of the sperm count, 50% of the testosterone of a 65 year old man. Our girls are hitting puberty 6 years early … our parents aren't having children." pic.twitter.com/RJFEVeqS0p
— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) October 16, 2025
We have questions. So many questions. People stepped up with one or two questions and comments of their own.
1.
Imagine them talking over their plan for today and he’s like, yeah I figure I’ll get up there and talk about my concerns regarding the sperm count of teenage boys. https://t.co/qBvUHq2BGM
— Ben Fowlkes (@benfowlkesMMA) October 16, 2025
2.
Nothing to see here, just a couple of sexual predators pontificating on the sex lives of teenage girls.
— Jo (@JoJoFromJerz) October 16, 2025
3.
This lying weirdo (RFK Jr) just makes up the oddest stuff. And the old weirdos next to him nod.
Bonkers. https://t.co/cshjMhRPkn
— Alastair McAlpine, MD (@AlastairMcA30) October 16, 2025
4.
You are telling the younger generations to have more babies while the government is literally shut down while they fight over canceling healthcare for millions. Zero self awareness. But nice distraction though
— Rachel Taylor (@rachtay86) October 16, 2025
5.
RFK Jr. is like a legacy admission, without his last name he'd be yelling on a street corner with a misspelled sign.
— DAPPER DON DHARSHI • K A M I L • (@SoloFlow786) October 16, 2025
6.
Cannot believe I just searched “teenage sperm count” on PubMed to confirm my suspicion that nowhere near enough adolescent semen research has occurred in any era to support this claim. Why is he always so weird about kids? https://t.co/Ag8XqIdzoi
— Dr. Angela Rasmussen (@angie_rasmussen) October 17, 2025
7.
RFK Jr knows this from his extensive FaceTime research pic.twitter.com/Oxc7chIGcx
— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) October 16, 2025
8.
“Our parents aren’t having children.”
“COVID will vanish like magic.”
“They’re eating the dogs, the people that came in, they’re eating the cats, they’re eating the pets of the people that live there.”
“We will build the wall and Mexico will pay for it.” pic.twitter.com/yfbCVCcPmq
— Stephen Simpson ProperGander (@BamaStephen) October 16, 2025
9.
RFK Jr just yowled about the country's declining fertility rate, calling it "a national security threat." These Young Republican leaders may explain everything pic.twitter.com/VnXvoO9c6U
— Paul Rudnick (@PaulRudnickNY) October 16, 2025
10.
Dear Bobby @SecKennedy:
Please cite studies published in reputable, peer-reviewed academic journals which support your crackpottery.
— Slowly Boiled Frog ️ (@davidcaryhart) October 16, 2025
11.
That’s not how words work. https://t.co/EvX7U4I95c
— Hemant Mehta (@hemantmehta) October 16, 2025
12.
You're correct my 75 year old parents aren't having children https://t.co/RpA0wkyYA3
— Auntie Smartassy (@AuntSassyAss) October 16, 2025