25 of the funniest posts we’ve seen on Bluesky this week
13.
Dads: Turn that bloody light off! It’s like Blackpool Illuminations in here. Do you think I’m made of money?
Dads at Christmas: I don’t think 96 strings of lights on the outside of the house is enough, love. Just popping to B&Q for another 47 and a 12ft illuminated reindeer.
— Amanda (@pandamoanimum.bsky.social) December 7, 2025 at 7:36 PM
14.
The world-weariest of all footballers was Thierry Ennui.
— Lev Parikian (@levparikian.bsky.social) December 4, 2025 at 9:10 PM
15.
Ceefax Unwrapped telling me the five pages I’ve used most this year:
1) Top 40, numbers 40-31
2) Subtitles for Scooby Doo to see how they spell his dialogue
3) Pic of Len Murray made out of pound signs
4) Subtitles for New Shmoo (see 2)
5) Pic of Norman Willis made out of ampersands— Justin Lewis (@whenisbirths.bsky.social) December 4, 2025 at 7:44 PM
16.
Are You There, God? God? God, You're On Mute. You're On Mute. God, You're, OK, Yep, We Can Hear You Now God, No, I Know, You'd Think We'd All Be Used To It By Now, Haha, Okay, So, It's Me, Margaret
— Al Kennedy (@alkennedy.bsky.social) December 4, 2025 at 10:23 PM
17.
Getting a bit bored of people banging on about "Herculean tasks". He only had twelve jobs. Twelve. My mate Dave has had twice as many in the last 20 years, and has only been fired 17 times and investigated by the police twice.
— Jason (@nickmotown.bsky.social) December 7, 2025 at 9:09 AM
18.
Re-reading Lord of the Rings at the moment, and I'd forgotten how relentlessly Gandalf drags Hobbits.
"Of course, The Enemy has overlooked one thing: dipshits such as yourself, Frodo. Buffoons with fat feet and shithole burrows. Yes, perhaps your painful loser energy may surprise Sauron yet!"
— Marsh Davies (@marshdavies.bsky.social) December 7, 2025 at 10:37 AM
19.
Red Lobster never released a commercial with a jingle that went “Shrimply having a wonderful Fishmastime.” That’s why they went bankrupt.
— Anthony Clark (@nedroid.com) December 5, 2025 at 12:09 AM
20.
Armed with only a brilliant script, even a young inexperienced screenwriter can get their work produced by a huge studio.
You just have to WANT it hard enough. Reach for the stars, budding writers!
— Gemma Arrowsmith (@mmaarrow.bsky.social) December 7, 2025 at 12:41 PM
21.
Found your Wikipedia page
— Bethany Black (@bethanyblack.bsky.social) December 7, 2025 at 12:58 PM
22.
Black Friday
Small Business Saturday
Cyber Monday
Giving Tuesday
Bankruptcy Wednesday— Rick Aaron (@rickaaron.bsky.social) December 3, 2025 at 1:16 PM
23.
I was sure Mensa would have solved all our problems by now.
— Jimmer Cork-Bottle (@jimmerthatisall.bsky.social) December 4, 2025 at 7:21 PM
24.
“Mattel’s commitment to storytelling and cultural impact makes this partnership special” is my secret code phrase to let you know I’ve been kidnapped fyi
— amy brown (@amybrown.xyz) December 6, 2025 at 2:57 PM
25.
My morning coffee had just worn off when the door opened. I knew from the silhouette who it was.
"Leo. Hear you made it to the top."
"Yeah. Got a job for you." He said.
"Why me?"
"Catholicism needs your… unique skills again." He said, smiling darkly. "Time to bring them down. From the inside"
— John Bull (@garius.bsky.social) December 9, 2025 at 12:04 PM
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25 of the funniest posts we’ve seen on Bluesky this week
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