Our 25 Favourite Funny Tweets of the Week
13.
"if I pronounce a word wrong, it's because I learned it by reading," I say through tears as my wife's step son roundly mocks me for saying "The Wizard of Ounce"
— Kyle (@KylePlantEmoji) December 30, 2025
14.
Next life I’m coming back as a weather girl so I can get paid to wear cute outfits and be wrong all the time.
— Emily ™ (@emily_tweets) December 30, 2025
15.
Books are so cool because there are NO FUCKING ADS IN THEM.
— Reads with Ravi (@readswithravi) December 30, 2025
16.
My goal was to lose 15 pounds this year.
Only 22 to go.— Gramps (@GrandpaHarris65) December 30, 2025
17.
Worth noting that if you buy someone a single, one-off gift from Debenhams, they will email you every day until you die – at which point they will offer you 15% off death.
— Ballbag (@JohnWickObertan) January 1, 2026
18.
sorry, tricky to celebrate 2026 when there are still bits of 2025 spot welded to the f**king porcelain… pic.twitter.com/4DWzTnADbR
— forest fr1ends (@forest_fr1ends) January 1, 2026
19.
Sorry I’m late. I clicked “check in” for a doctor’s appointment and I’ve been filling out forms for days.
— Terri Paella Piñata (@terrip38) December 30, 2025
20.
You can’t scare me, you’re not my 8yo nephew who just said, “I wasn’t even going to try to break a window.”
— krista (@kristabellerina) December 29, 2025
21.
they should invent a reverse gift card you can give to your enemies. eat shit Ron now you owe Applebee's $50
— trash jones (@jzux) December 29, 2025
22.
1960: in 2025 we’ll have flying cars
2025: pic.twitter.com/ASkovStoJK
— greg (@greg16676935420) December 30, 2025
23.
Have you ever woken up full of joy, kissed the person next to you, and just felt glad you were alive?
That's why I'm not allowed to fly Delta anymore.
— Keith Humphreys (@KeithNHumphreys) December 31, 2025
24.
My daughter started playing the flute just two weeks ago. She’s terrible.
Anyway, she just turned down an invitation to perform at the Trump-Kennedy Center.
— Captain Obvious™️ (@TheFungi669) January 1, 2026
25.
Dec 31, 11:59 PM: I am going to attempt dry January.
Jan 1, 12:01 AM: Dammit.
— The Real Rodney Lacroix (@RealRodLacroix) January 1, 2026
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Our 25 Favourite Funny Tweets of the Week
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