Just 25 really funny jokes from the last week
14.
me: alexa
alexa: that name was a fiction to hide my true identity, alizarin the demon god of fear and-
me: is it okay to microwave glass
alexa: for how long
— shen the bird (@Shen_the_Bird) October 11, 2018
15.
https://twitter.com/LlamaInaTux/status/1050062510273908736
15.
https://twitter.com/daemonic3/status/1050091437134557185
16.
https://twitter.com/forest_fr1ends/status/1050454387611631617
17.
https://twitter.com/davidschneider/status/1050300735966105601
18.
wait a minute you just said "fly me to the moon" what's all this stuff about jupiter and mars, that's two whole other trips. the moon is a great place to be, just have a wander around, look at some rocks, don't be flying off in all directions looking for weather on other planets.
— wolf pupy (@wolfpupy) October 12, 2018
19.
Nobody found it odd that the punishment for skipping class at the High School in "The Breakfast Club" carried the same penalty as bringing a gun to school and assaulting a student?
— Dan Regan (@DanRegan_Comedy) October 11, 2018
20.
Me: *looking at a wine menu* I'll have a bottle of white.
McDonald's employee: Where did you get that?
— ste(ph)en (@stephenjmolloy) October 12, 2018
21.
https://twitter.com/CHIMPSINSOCKS/status/1050418066071404544
22.
https://twitter.com/frankieboyle/status/1049351768252059648
23.
Why are they called customs sniffer dogs and not border colleagues?
— Andy Ryan (@ItsAndyRyan) October 10, 2018
24.
I asked the Doctor whether masturbation causes poor eyesight. He said, "You're in Greggs, mate".
— Ian Power (@IHPower) October 8, 2018
25.
https://twitter.com/dopeaccident/status/1048922447532216324
As always, we’d love you to send us the funniest joke you’ve seen this week.