Shappi Khorsandi asked about the tightest things people had experienced – these 17 will make you despair
If there could be said to be any kind of positive from the pandemic we’re living through – and that would really be a stretch – it’s that it has shown how generous people can be, with their time, their money and their efforts.
However, comedian Shappi Khorsandi reminded us that not everyone has a giving nature.
Whats the tightest thing anyone has ever done to you? When I was an A level student (skint) a (rich, got a huge allowance) friend only half finished her jacket potato in a cafe. I asked if I could finish it (no pride). She said 'sure, you'll have to give me 50p though' Beat that?
— Shappi Khorsandi (@ShappiKhorsandi) April 29, 2020
As bad as that was, some of these responses were even worse.
1.
Lianne was at school with someone who won millions on the lottery; she threw a party and everyone got two drinks tokens.
— Mark Watson, banging on for absolutely ages (@watsoncomedian) April 29, 2020
2.
Looking for somewhere to eat with a friend, they suggested Pizza Express because they had a voucher for 50% off. End of the meal, I put in half the money and they said, "What are you doing? Mine's free – it's my voucher!" I had to pay for the whole thing.
— Nick Doody (@NickDoody) April 29, 2020
3.
My housemate at uni (rich parents paid her rent, bills, gave her a hefty allowance and bought her anything she wanted) offered me (parents wouldn't give me a penny, couldn't afford proper meals) a few puffs on her joint. She later asked me to pay for the weed I'd smoked.
— Sutton Sal (@ambersalamander) April 29, 2020
4.
When my Dad passed away I had to fly home to Ireland for his funeral, my ex husband had to take our three kids for a week , he docked me $300 from Child support for having them #Charming
— Fiona O’Brien (@RealFionaO) April 29, 2020
5.
"Hi mate, can you come shoot our bands concert saturday? We need some new pics online. You can? Great. The tickets are 40 pounds".
— larsaalgaard (@larsaalgaard) April 29, 2020
6.
My grandad was a black cabbie for a while. Gave my mum a lift home because 3-year-old me had new shoes on that rubbed and I had bleeding blisters.
He put the meter on— Kay Worboys Writer (@KayWorboys) April 29, 2020
7.
My sister charged me £90 to look after my cat while I was on my honeymoon.
— Felicity Hannah (@FelicityHannah) April 29, 2020
8.
A self-employed ex-boyfriend once tried to charge me his daily rate to take the day off for my birthday.
— Lucie Fur (@Lucie_Fur99) April 29, 2020
9.
My friend once said she was buying me and our other friend a round of shots. She bought one shot and made the barman divide it into 3 shotglasss.
— 🌈 Kerry Cameron 🤟 (@kerryannjust) April 29, 2020