The UK’s quarantine hotel booking system crashed instantly – of course

In episode 5,497 of ‘Are You Sure Armando Aianucci Didn’t Write This?’, the system set up for booking into the quarantine hotel programme, which becomes compulsory on Monday, crashed within hours of its launch.

COVID-19: Quarantine hotel booking system goes down hours after it goes live https://t.co/nFgsBVijjW

— Sky News (@SkyNews) February 11, 2021

It was the icing on the cake of catastrophe that has characterised the project, from the moist sponge of it taking so long to implement …

Today we mark the first anniversary of when it was obvious Johnson should have done something.

— Armando Iannucci (@Aiannucci) February 11, 2021

to the leaky filling of failure to communicate with the hotels involved, right up until the last week.

From the government that brought you the greatest change in our trading rules in decades at a few days’ notice…

Proof that no Tory donors own hotels. https://t.co/UlGejSl2aM

— David Schneider (@davidschneider) February 8, 2021

Labour’s Deputy Leader, Angela Rayner, vented.

A year into the pandemic, 110,000 deaths and the worst recession of any major economy and the best this shower of a government can come up with to protect our country against deadly new variants is a rubbish version of https://t.co/lfobPkezfH which immediately goes down https://t.co/yA7Q3UnxzZ

— Angela Rayner 😷 (@AngelaRayner) February 11, 2021

She wasn’t the only one to have thoughts on the matter.

1.

As I’m always saying to my Ministers, it isn’t enough just to do things too late, you have to do them very badly and with great incompetence too. https://t.co/PyqtiP6LCh

— Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) February 11, 2021

2.

Got about 2 days before we find out it was built using Microsoft Paint https://t.co/9HALGnJdrH

— James Felton (@JimMFelton) February 11, 2021

3.

Turns out the company Chris Grayling hired didn't have experience of online booking, they'd just read something on a kindle. https://t.co/scV2MYScfi

— HappyToast ★ (@IamHappyToast) February 11, 2021

4.

World beating booking system from a great chap I met at the races. pic.twitter.com/Wsi3pSSuTp

— Ed Losty (@elosty) February 11, 2021

5.

We're all shocked. https://t.co/7g8m0cP2hD

— Zoe Gardner (@ZoeJardiniere) February 11, 2021

6.

Don't tell me. Booking system was outsourced to a company set up last week by the wife of a minister's friend.

— Peter Bamford (@bamforp) February 11, 2021

7.

Wait… What….How….they have been so good at everything else https://t.co/DMyXUSsMPc

— Branston (@branston_f) February 11, 2021

8.

Modus operandi pic.twitter.com/IwrrSKeY4J

— dynamodigby (@dynamospaine17) February 11, 2021

9.

“what are you in for?”

“the quarantine booking system didn’t work” https://t.co/3RpiJ7GpHz pic.twitter.com/kMAz440Xzi

— dean (@DeanRed123) February 11, 2021

One funny tweeter, Not Andrea Jenkyns MP, had the gotcha version.

Travel-bodge https://t.co/DzdztZbM6R

— Not Andrea Jenkyns MP (@BlandreaJ) February 11, 2021

Other shambolic hotel chains are available – Shitannia, The Badisson and of course – Holiday Outt.

READ MORE

The UK’s quarantine hotels plan is a shambles – 9 favourite takedowns

Source Sky News Image Christin Hume on Unsplash, Screengrab