25 of the funniest posts we’ve seen on Bluesky this week
We’ve made it to halfway through January – more or less.
Before you know it, you’ll be wondering how it’s summer already, and remembering when Donald Trump was still the President of the USA – instead of in a nursing home for the utterly bewildered or because Elon Musk has now made him Emperor of the Galactic Federation. Who knows which way it will go?
In the here and now, we’ve found 25 very funny posts on Bluesky, and we present them to you as a minor distraction from *waves hand at skip fire*.
1.
the doctors at the emergency room said they’re going to have me arrested if i come in because of flamin’ hot cheetos again
— Ygrene (@ygrene.bsky.social) January 10, 2026 at 10:41 PM
2.
Ideally Keir Starmer will outlaw both X and Tottenham Hotspur this week, for the sake of so many people
— Greg Jenner (@gregjenner.bsky.social) January 10, 2026 at 6:37 PM
3.
I got an Alexa for Christmas. I am currently getting weather forecasts for Poland. It is not coping with my accent. I live in Walsall 😂
— Mary Bartram (@stymistress.bsky.social) January 12, 2026 at 8:03 PM
4.
That awkward moment when you order the cajun catfish, and they bring a strapping, 64-year-old trucker from New Orleans to your table, who introduces himself as Rachelle, a teenage cheerleader.
— Jason (@nickmotown.bsky.social) January 12, 2026 at 2:40 PM
5.
Did someone put the uk through grok?
— christhebarker (@christhebarker.bsky.social) January 9, 2026 at 7:56 AM
6.
Kemi Badenoch thinks Greenland is a supermarket chain
— Toby Earle 🇺🇦 (@tobyontv.bsky.social) January 11, 2026 at 5:32 PM
7.
Happy birthday to us! Greeneville Zoo began 93 years ago today, after our founder Gavin's fourth failed attempt to chase a badger out of his dining room.
— Greeneville Zoo (@greenevillezoo.bsky.social) January 10, 2026 at 10:52 PM
8.
CGI has never achieved anything as impressive as Jim Henson making Kermit the Frog ride a bicycle
— John (@notheotherjohn.bsky.social) January 8, 2026 at 9:35 PM
9.
Adagio For Scissors
— Chris Addison (@mrchrisaddison.bsky.social) January 12, 2026 at 4:24 PM
10.
Our beef supplier has issued a recall. There's nothing wrong with the meat, they just don't like the way we use it.
— River Side Casino (@riversidecasino.bsky.social) January 13, 2026 at 12:23 AM
11.
On average, I spend about $150 a year to watch bananas turn brown.
12.
If you write javascript to replace "the markets" with "the spiders" then financial news makes much more sense
— Rob Manuel (@robmanuel.b3ta.com) January 12, 2026 at 12:04 PM