The Church of England is going on about sex again- our 14 favourite funny comments
As they like to do from time to time, the Church of England has made a pronouncement on what is and isn’t acceptable in people’s sex lives. Nobody was surprised to learn they still insist sex is for married heterosexual couples only.
You can read all about it here, if you haven’t got dozens of better things to do.
Sex is for married heterosexual couples only, says Church of England https://t.co/jDxAA96mQU
— The Guardian (@guardian) January 23, 2020
People had plenty of reasons to clap back at the Church, and these reactions pretty much cover them.
1.
British government: Let’s forsake modernity for a return to the Middle Ages.
Royal Family: Hold our beer.
Church of England: F*@k all y'all. https://t.co/EknB1iCJDj
— Alex Winter (@Winter) January 23, 2020
2.
It’s a bit late for a church which was created for the sole purpose of letting a fat king dump his wife in favour of the girlfriend he would eventually have beheaded to develop a moral platform on relationship issues https://t.co/sBTJdOmhcv
— Mitch Benn🇬🇧🇪🇺 (@MitchBenn) January 23, 2020
3.
Australia is on Fire.
Myanmar is convicted of Genocide.
Iran is in turmoil.
Coronavirus is spreading globally.
Trump is impeached.
Trump is still running for President.
Boris Johnson is Prime Minister.
Brexit is happening in one week.
Church of England announces today: https://t.co/InX7oEchqU
— Dr. Jennifer Cassidy (@OxfordDiplomat) January 23, 2020
4.
Some married heterosexual couples, particularly those who have been married for a long time, may find the evidence is against this. https://t.co/YwC70bdBJz
— David Baddiel (@Baddiel) January 23, 2020
5.
… "to the priests" https://t.co/EaykQnz8XJ
— Jemaine Clement (@AJemaineClement) January 23, 2020
6.
fine, I'll just have sex with married heterosexual couples from now on https://t.co/3dPGvc32o2
— Marie Le Conte (@youngvulgarian) January 23, 2020
7.
Dear all religions, off you fuck, you outdated, problem causing, money grabbing, people oppressing bunch of made up bollocks https://t.co/14jzv17ZiL
— HappyToast ★ (@IamHappyToast) January 23, 2020