‘What’s the best nickname you’ve heard, and the reason for it?’ – 23 excellent British monikers

If there’s one thing that British people adore, aside from Greggs, it’s giving each other inventive nicknames that stick for many, many years past their original invention.

They’ve been talking about this on the AskUK subreddit after xpltvdeleted posted this:

I’m trying to make the case that the UK is far more nickname-oriented than the US.

This stemmed from my American wife pointing out none of her friends in her entire school/uni/professional life she’s only known one or two girls that have ever been known by their last name – whereas, growing up in the UK, a large number of girls I’ve been friends with have gone by their nicknames – and my sister was also called by her surname by her mates. That then lead me to suggest that in the UK we actively look for nicknames and rarely call friends by their first name.

What I’m asking though, is an extension of that: what is the best nickname you’ve heard that isn’t based on a person’s surname. Or maybe it is, but it’s four or five evolutions on from the surname to the point where it’s unrecognisable?

And their fellow Brits enthusiastically jumped in with the silly names their mates have affectionately been given, like these…

1.

‘5.6ft tradesman called Anthony. His nickname… Shetland Tony.’
–Boogaaa

2.

‘Husband works beside a guy called Tinyboots because his safety boots are so small.’
–littlerabbits72

3.

‘I like the one I heard about a guy’s mate who was super hairy and worked at a phone shop, his mates called him the Carphone Warewolf.’
–CertainFurball

4.

‘Guy called Keth (real name Keith) because he was missing an eye.’
–Gary_BBGames

5.

‘There was an engineer at a place I used to work who had lost a digit, so he got called KitKat because he only had four fingers.’
–WotanMjolnir

6.

‘A friend of mine is missing half a finger. He walked into our local one day on the phone so just held up his fingers meaning ‘two pints’. The barmaid poured him a pint and a half.’
–BobbyPotter

7.

‘My uncle used to work with a guy they called Six Months because he had half an ear (year/ear/here all sound the same in the Valleys).’
–BywydBeic

8.

‘I knew a girl called Sue. She was called Sue Narmy because she fell into the lake on a school trip.’
–BenisDDD69

9.

‘A bloke who used to talk really quietly once wore a black and yellow jumper to work. He was known as the Mumblebee ever since.’
–Butter_the_Toast

10.

‘Uni mate called Shania. His real name was Duane.’
–mike_dowler

11.

‘Have a friend called ‘Pilot Light’ because he never goes out.’

12.

‘Bit of a local one , but Castleton because he is beyond Hope.’
–monkeymidd