25 of the funniest posts we’ve seen on Bluesky this week
13.
"Doctor I am feeling depressed"
"Yeah me too, saw this clown last night"
"Doctor"
"Fucking awful clown. Made me so angry"
"Doctor"
"Like how can a clown be so shit"
"Doctor please"
"So angry I have quit being a therapist and am now a clown assassin"
"What"— TechnicallyRon (@technicallyron.bsky.social) 19 May 2026 at 14:17
14.
I know what you’re thinking. Sherlock Holmes has let himself go.
— Graeme Swanson (@swansonian.bsky.social) 18 May 2026 at 14:16
15.
the beauty of this website is that every morning you can wake up to a new bloody civil war with absolutely no indication whether it was incited by someone saying “silk boxers are mid” or “I believe you should be allowed to eat any dog under ten pounds”
— ceej (@ceej.online) 13 May 2026 at 18:38
16.
Now Hiring: Penguin Tap Dance Instructor.
— Greeneville Zoo (@greenevillezoo.bsky.social) 14 May 2026 at 02:26
17.
Sleep coach:
Relax and clear your mind.Insomnia coach:
Remember in 5th grade when Jennifer Danforth waved in your direction so you waved back but she yelled “Eww, not you!” and everyone laughed? Good, you’re doing great.
18.
It's hard to be happy these days knowing that a lot of hippos go to bed hungry hungry.
— Charlie Alzamora (@chalza.bsky.social) 17 May 2026 at 22:45
19.
My nephew is telling me he’s a little teapot. Only 5 years old and already a fucking liar like his father.
— Octopus/Caveman (@octopuscaveman.bsky.social) 18 May 2026 at 05:06
20.
Do you mean clap?
— Caitlin (@caitlintake2.bsky.social) 30 April 2026 at 05:52
21.
I wish I could be as good at anything as the guy in Switzerland is at poking holes in cheese.
— Siege (@tellumsiege.bsky.social) 17 May 2026 at 02:15
22.
I asked my Ouija board if anyone has a secret crush on me. It must be broken, because I don’t even know anyone named Lol.
— John Lyon (@johnlyon.bsky.social) 17 May 2026 at 16:28
23.
If the Eurovision Song Contest has taught me anything it’s that the UK is to Europe what the USA is to the rest of the world.
— bacon popsicle 🍵 (@gupton68.bsky.social) 17 May 2026 at 08:56
24.
while bluesky was down i read four books, cleaned my garage and baked a soufflé. thank god it’s back
— FROVO (@frovo.bsky.social) 19 May 2026 at 02:12
25.
41 years of EastEnders and someone finally said it.
— Nick Walker (@nickwalker.bsky.social) 19 May 2026 at 20:02
