‘What’s the daftest way you’ve heard someone tell on themselves?’ – 22 people who accidentally said the quiet part out loud

12.

‘My uncle used his wife’s phone to contact his mistress…’
–DECKTHEBALLZ

13.

‘A few people at work have been caught skiving, thanks to their social media footprint, and adding managers as their friends.

One girl lost her wfh privileges after posting Insta videos of herself and her boyfriend out on a trip to the moors whilst she was supposed to be working.

And another bloke rang in sick on new years day with gastroenteritis. Of course the managers then saw photos of him out until 3am on new years day absolutely shit faced.

It’s best to keep work and social media separate.’
–zombie_Ernie

14.

‘I shouted at a young woman to stop trying to set a bin on fire at the train station. She called the police on me for shouting at her… and explained to them what she was doing when I shouted.

Needless to say, I wasn’t the one who was arrested.’
–oscarx-ray

15.

‘I’m a teacher, this happened years ago. I knew one of my students had been drawing on their table with permanent markers but had not been able to catch them in the act.

One lesson I noticed a couple of markers on their desk and asked “Oh, which one do you use to draw on your desk?”. The answer “This one miss”.

The utter shock on their face of what they’d just done was too funny, and quickly followed by detention.’
–Cylana-Ione

16.

‘Our workplace doesn’t allow mobile phones on our person while working. One guy told management he needed his on him for the time being for emergency purposes. It was genuine, and approved by management.

Another worker who didn’t get on with him came in one day and saw him on his phone, proceeded to record him on his own phone, and went and showed management the video. Guess who got in trouble.’
–SkeletorOnLSD

17.

‘I remember when I was little we were in church. My older sister (8) told my parents that my eyes were open when I was praying.’
–Cold_Philosophy

18.

‘A guy at work took a week or so off without explaining and upon return said “uh, my mum died”. A few weeks later he said he spent his weekend helping his mum with something, when asked “I thought your mum passed?” He said “oh, uh, I call my step mum my mum too”.’
–jrbp

19.

‘This is a punch line for a joke but to hear someone ask it in real life was wild. Was talking to a friend about water polo when his girlfriend asked, “How do they get the horses into the pool?”.’
–Needle_Bearings

20.

‘A guy I used to work with just nonchalantly mentioned that when he needs to he goes into the bathroom to take a dump when his wife is in the bath, as part of another story he was telling. He thought everyone did it and then was mortified when everyone was looking at him funny about it.’
–Familiar_Benefit_776

21.

‘The guy on Judge Judy who was accused of stealing a woman’s purse, and the woman says something like, “The purse had my ID and $50 cash in it.” And the guy interjects “Your honour, there was no cash in the purse.” and Judge Judy immediately rules against him.’
–haddock420

22.

‘A bloke at my old work loudly asked the room if anyone else parks round the corner so the boss cannot see what time they actually arrive. Silence. Then he realised the boss was stood right behind him.’
–Ok-Pain-2444

Source r/AskUK Image Screenshot