People are making up bizarre Les Dennis stories after he took on a troll and it’s utterly gloriously

Les Dennis was trending on Twitter today and it might just be the distraction we all need from coronavirus, for a couple of moments at least.

It all began when someone called @RickB560 went on Twitter to say he had met the former Family Fortunes presenter (and other stuff) and had been supremely disappointed, to say the least.

Met @LesDennis today in the Brewers Fayre in Warrington. What a disappointment!!!! Refused to have a picture with me and swore at my 2 year old son. #Disappointed

— Rick (@RickB560) March 8, 2020

Dennis was having none of this and said it absolutely, definitely, 100% did not happen.

No you didn’t. I am at home and have been all day. Don’t lie. https://t.co/IqC49DPxaI

— Les Dennis (@LesDennis) March 8, 2020

And if Dennis was hoping that would put the whole thing to bed, he was only half right.

Because it prompted people – lots of people – to share their own fantastical, entirely made-up memories of the time they met him and, well, have a read for yourself.

1.

I saw Les Dennis throwing Guide Dogs off the top of a multi storey car park a few years back.
He seemed especially pleased when they didn’t die straight away.

— Nodwell (@the_sensefield) March 9, 2020

2.

Met les Dennis at a swingers party in Essex in 1979, told him I wasn’t into deprived sexual activities, told me to fuck off then banged my wife’s back doors for 45 minutes whilst singing you never walk alone

— misunderstood Moyes (@misunde68152141) March 9, 2020

3.

Les Dennis pushed me up against the wall of a lazerquest in Blackpool when I was 13. I had just shot him and he snarled "Don't make me end you, you little shit.".

— jimmythekiller (@jimmythekiller3) March 9, 2020

4.

Hello is that Heat Magazine? I just spotted Les Dennis, the comedian and impressionist and actor Les Dennis. I just spotted him shopping in New Bond Street, and he was spending a fucking shit load of cash alright? So put that in, make sure you put that in https://t.co/WBEu8tzPgW

— Em (@emroberts21) March 9, 2020

5.

I met Les Dennis in WHSmith’s in Dulwich. He was stuffing all the razz mags down his trousers and high on Sherbert Fountains. He ran out without paying, punched a pensioner off a scooter and drove off giggling. Later on I heard he ramraided the local dog shelter maiming 2 collies

— benj clews (@benjclews) March 9, 2020

6.

I met Les Dennis in a cave in Colwyn Bay. He refused to tie my laces for me as he claimed he didn’t do ‘freebies’ in dimly lit bat infested welsh holes. He kicked my dog up the arse and threatened if I ever used that cave again he’d eat my family #disappointed

— Sammy Walnuts 🌹 (@dj_walnuts) March 9, 2020

7.

Mixed news on the Les Dennis front for me today. He kindly popped round, did my washing for me then popped it on hangers above the radiator so it would be nice and dry, but he also ransacked my Quality Streets leaving me only with toffee pennies and them shit coconut things. pic.twitter.com/fzJWIfnWF8

— Super Kevin Bremner (@skb777) March 9, 2020

8.

I once met Les Dennis in Lidl. He was seething as he'd specifically went there for the half price mangoes but the shelf was empty. He said he felt like he'd been lured there under false pretences. He shat on the croissants and left.

— badness.co.uk (@badnessmonster) March 9, 2020

9.

I met Les Dennis once at a chip shop in Scarborough, I asked him to pass me the salt, he'd slyly unscrewed the top and ruined my fish and chip supper. I asked him to replace it so he flipped me the V sign called me a chubby chick and said he'd done me a favour, so rude #lesdennis

— Jenny Smith (@JennySm39142180) March 9, 2020

10.

Met les Dennis at a swingers party in Essex in 1979, told him I wasn’t into deprived sexual activities, told me to fuck off then banged my wife’s back doors for 45 minutes whilst singing you never walk alone

— misunderstood Moyes (@misunde68152141) March 9, 2020

11.

Met Les Dennis in Spoons in Barnsley

Bought him a dark fruits and he never got me one back, the tight bastard

— Reverend&TheMakers (@Reverend_Makers) March 9, 2020

12.

I remember meeting Les Dennis as a kid. I asked him for his autograph. He looked me straight in the eye as he reached into his pocket, pulled out a turtle, and took a huge bite out of it like it was a pasty.

— Captain Bison Trippshorn (@Brainmage) March 9, 2020

13.

Met Les Dennis at a Waterstones in 2017. They didn't have his book so he was signing books from the Sci Fi section on the cover or on random pages. The police eventually threw a bunch of smoke grenades into the shop and he ran out. This apparently happens every few months.

— Tankerton Latch (@TankertonLatch) March 9, 2020

14.

I saw Les Dennis at my corner shop forcing the owner to play Russian roulette with a loaded .357 magnum revolver. He kept shouting "rub the puffin in the chip fat" at the owner.

— pathfinder2 (@pathfinder2) March 9, 2020

15.

Looked through my telescope in the garden last night. I saw Les Dennis doing a spacewalk in orbit, trying to divert an asteroid so it would collide with Earth. Very disappointed.

— Stephen McGann (@StephenMcGann) March 9, 2020

But what really happened to prompt that first, entirely erroneous tweet? Apart from being totally made-up, you might think.

This has absolutely sent me, I MUST know why a random tweeter has decided to start a smear campaign against Les Dennis pic.twitter.com/rriFajm8rT

— ⛈️ Dave on Me ⛈️ (@DaveyBlahBlah) March 9, 2020

Something like this, perhaps.

I like to imagine your lookalike at the Brewers Fayre, being accosted by a stranger and told to have his photo taken.

— David Quantick (@quantick) March 9, 2020

And him repeatedly telling them that he wasn't you, and them not believing him and getting shitty with him and him STILL saying he's not you and then their kid calling him a liar to which he replies "I'm not lying you little shit." and they STILL think it's you.

— Rufus Hound 🌨 (@RufusHound) March 9, 2020

Just in case you were still in any doubt, there was this.

I metLes Dennis… I really liked him. pic.twitter.com/GOcr8ivZmS

— Nitin Ganatra (@GanatraNitin) March 9, 2020

And this.

We met les Dennis in Nottingham and he was the loveliest! pic.twitter.com/0qwIW5bIhT

— ☆Kel C☆ (@KelCurwood34) March 9, 2020

Last word to @LesDennis, obviously.

All the I met Les Dennis posts are making me laugh out loud. You’re all making me see that Twitter can be a great place despite the odd idiot. Thank you all.

— Les Dennis (@LesDennis) March 9, 2020

READ MORE

This lovely Les Dennis story about him and Amanda Holden is 33 seconds very well spent

Source Twitter @LesDennis Image ITV