Our 25 favourite tweets of the week
13.
me when I get ice cream out of the freezer and it's too hard for me to get my spoon in immediately pic.twitter.com/XQTsHEBv9c
— Sooz Kempner (@SoozUK) April 14, 2021
14.
I wonder if tired pigs wake up and go "Ugh God… I look like a human".
— Aisling Bea (@WeeMissBea) April 15, 2021
15.
Me & my husband can sit in silence all evening then the moment I step foot into another room in the house he will shout something inaudible through to me & I will shout back that I can't hear him & he will shout back that "It doesn't fucking matter."
Stay single kids.
— (@pearlylondon) April 14, 2021
16.
Hello Clarice pic.twitter.com/GF5f3kUEiO
— James Felton (@JimMFelton) April 15, 2021
17.
News: Woman finds Black Widow Spider in bag of grapes.
Another reason to not eat healthy. You never find spiders in packs of bacon.
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) April 15, 2021
18.
I cook that much pasta in case 57 extra people drop by unexpectedly it’s not that hard to understand Janice
— MumInBits (@MumInBits) April 14, 2021
19.
This egg could use more egg
– guy about to invent hollandaise sauce
— Average Dad (@Average_Dad1) April 13, 2021
20.
When the Olive Garden waiter asks if you want more Parmesan pic.twitter.com/vBXcelsK2X
— ✨ (@christinamagma) April 13, 2021
21.
Catfish episodes start like "It all began when I got a friend request from Kurt Cobain.. 🥰"
— ምኞት (@blanketm9) April 13, 2021
22.
Friend: My daughter is in college studying psych
Me: So she's not in college?
— octopus/caveman (@OctopusCaveman) April 13, 2021
23.
me: onion rings and a bottle of wine for the table
waiter: white or red?
me, trying to impress my date: whichever onion the chef prefers
— suki (@desukidesu) April 12, 2021
24.
Yard reviews
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
"Amazing milkshakes"⭐☆☆☆☆
"Too many boys"— Dr Pessimus Prime – advocate for long-arm T rex (@BigJDubz) April 11, 2021
25.
When someone brings up hedge funds, I instantly stop listening.
1. I don't understand them
2. I'm imagining hedgehogs in fancy suits— Kona Slater ☕ (@KonaSlater) February 28, 2021
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Simply 25 great tweets from this week
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