Our 50 favourite Christmas tweets of 2021
26.
Just learned that as a child my dad was demoted from being Joseph in a Nativity play to being the innkeeper, due to bad behaviour, so, in revenge, when Joseph enquired if there was any room at the inn he yelled loudly YES, HEAPS
— Caustic Cover Critic (@Unwise_Trousers) December 8, 2021
27.
I’ll be honest, the “Santa is watching!” threat does about 90 percent of my parenting in December.
— The Dad (@thedad) December 8, 2021
28.
Yeah, it's unusual for a photo of your beer delivery guy to make it on the family Christmas card, but it's been an unusual year.
— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) December 8, 2021
29.
If the Ghost Of Christmas Past showed up I’d just take the opportunity to leave former me a note that says “buy Apple stock.”
— WOODROW PEEL (@WoodyLuvsCoffee) December 9, 2021
30.
what the hell were the other failed nogs before they settled on egg
— taming fred savage (@FredTaming) December 8, 2021
31.
I saw this delightful Christmas drinks dispenser earlier and now I can’t get the word ‘smeggnog’ out of my head. pic.twitter.com/2IQXcXEG0W
— Flups (@TheRealFlups) December 13, 2021
32.
Yearly reminder that Santa has a big list of uncaught murderers and sex offenders and chooses not to hand it over to the authorities
— James Felton (@JimMFelton) December 13, 2021
33.
Those two words a parent hears after their child opens the last Christmas present: Anything else?
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) December 14, 2021
34.
‘Twas the week before Christmas
And all through the house
Not a creature was stirring
Not even pic.twitter.com/CJHi9Opc9z— Robin Flavell (@RobinFlavell) December 17, 2021
35.
"Tonight you will be visited by three ghosts, and you won’t believe what number two will tell you!"
– A Christmas Clickbait— paul bassett davies (@thewritertype) December 16, 2021
36.
My favorite Christmas carol is Here Comes the Rain Again
by Eurythmics.— 🌸Likes🌸 (@broken_rhi) December 12, 2021
37.
Aldi party food:
Ham fists
Prawn straps
3 bird Waynes
Tyres (mixed)
Mince cables
Slim kievs
Edris elbows
Lamb cortinas— cluedont (@cluedont) December 18, 2021
38.
The correct order to watch Christmas films is 1) Love, Actually and then 2) Die Hard, so that Alan Rickman gets his comeuppance for cheating on Emma Thompson pic.twitter.com/s3J6EQFtWf
— It's Katemas Time (@katebevan) December 19, 2021
39.
Bought this for my wife after asking my father-in-law what I should get her for Christmas.
Bit odd, but he definitely said spoiler #Christmas2021 #christmasideas #ChristmasGifts2021 pic.twitter.com/mxQxqQ8PEN— Ben Turner Comedian (@benturnercomedy) December 15, 2021
40.
These 3-bird roasts are very reasonably priced, considering how rare it is to find a turkey that's eaten a duck that's eaten a chicken.
— Craig Deeley 🇪🇺🏳️🌈 (@craiguito) December 20, 2021
41.
Surely the best way to sing silent night is by shutting the fuck up.
— David Hughes (@david8hughes) December 19, 2021
42.
cop: *smashing with baton* looks like you got a broken light here
santa: this is bullshit
rudolph: MY FUGGIN NODE
— Adam Cerious (@Browtweaten) December 19, 2021
43.
Tell me you have a cat without telling me you have a cat pic.twitter.com/Z2PuHqN4Kb
— mom mom mom mom mom (@notmythirdrodeo) December 21, 2021
44.
Tiny Tim was the REAL villain in Dickens’ A Christmas Carol, read my column in The Spectator. pic.twitter.com/wEceoVXVux
— Bethany Black twitch.tv/beffernieblack (@BeffernieBlack) December 21, 2021
45.
If he was arranged diagonally would you call him Slanta?
— Danny (@Mardigroan) December 22, 2021
46.
So apparently the gardai have the power to remove relatives from your house over Christmas??? Does anyone know if this is a free service and can we book in advance
— ho-ho-horlagh (@broomxbitch) December 21, 2021
47.
Can’t afford Christmas this year as my new job only pays in cartoon strips. It’s Peanuts.
— Christmas (St)Eve Blair (@UniversalExile) December 22, 2021
48.
Fun Christmas activities:
• Helping a nutcracker defeat a Mouse King.
• Letting said nutcracker take you to a Marzipan Kingdom.
• Dancing in the snow while a man with scissor hands sculpts your likeness out of ice.— Icona 📚 (@Iconawrites) December 22, 2021
49.
Just asked my Dad when we’re going to watch Muppets Christmas Carol and he said “well whenever you want, we’ve got it on tape” and so it appears we’re going to watch it in the year 1998.
— Mollie Goodfellow (@hansmollman) December 22, 2021
50.
When your siblings are opening their presents. pic.twitter.com/DrCDC9hw8m
— Fergus Craig (@FergusCraig) December 22, 2021
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Simply 33 Christmas jokes to get you right into the festive spirit
Image Nennieinszweidrei on Pixabay
