Our top 40 funny tweets of October
21.
Washing machine: Hey, your laundry's done.
Me: May I have it?
Washing machine: No, hang on, I need 30 seconds to say goodbye.— A G G G Ghost (@Scriblit) October 14, 2023
22.
"What flavour you having?"
"I don't know. Orange?"
"No can do, it's either Lewis Hamilton or Assault" pic.twitter.com/7OC4lfRQvE— Sam Whyte (@SamWhyte) October 15, 2023
23.
Don't be afraid to ask questions during a job interview. It's the best way to find out if the person you're interviewing is a good candidate for the job.
— Martin Pilgrim (@MartinPilgrim1) October 8, 2023
24.
Brian Harvey singing
“Stay another day” pic.twitter.com/pVNManN78I— K ❤️ (@misskaren1981) October 17, 2023
25.
— Kristi Yamaguccimane (@TheWapplehouse) October 16, 2023
26.
No it wasn’t. pic.twitter.com/t2d6lF5wzp
— Jay Foreman (@jayforeman) October 18, 2023
27.
Sunak now so desperate for votes he’s giving away free watches. pic.twitter.com/7RBioms8Ra
— Alistair Barrie (@AlistairBarrie) October 15, 2023
28.
Mary : i’m pregnant
Joseph : but we’ve never had sex??
Mary : you’re not gonna believe this..
— Satan (@s8n) October 16, 2023
29.
What's King Charles' favourite console?
.
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.
.
.
.
.
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The Royal Wii.— Bec Hill (@bechillcomedian) October 19, 2023
30.
Feeling cute. May move across the room later. pic.twitter.com/nYTvI0S2iN
— National Park Service (@NatlParkService) October 19, 2023
31.
saw a hinge profile that said "dom. cinephile." like what, are you gonna tie me up with an HDMI cable and make me watch the seventh seal?
— Rachel Elizabeth (@chaotic_sub) October 20, 2023
32.
It's always a bit mad to me that Michelin's main business is rubber tyres, but they also run a globally recognised restaurant rating system.
Like if Greggs did baked goods as their main business but also works as OFSTED
— Dr Philip Lee (@drphiliplee1) October 23, 2023
33.
Congressmen leap into action as the House of Representatives gerbil makes a bid for freedom pic.twitter.com/CwUzHmNkUj
— Fancy Brenda ️️⚧️ (they/she) (@SpillerOfTea) October 26, 2023
34.
that’s… actually the optimal kind of toilet when you think about it pic.twitter.com/ZiA1pLlhxe
— edie! edi! edié! (@ediemullen) October 24, 2023
35.
I'm going to write a book about all the things I should have done with my life.
l'll call it my oughtabiography.
— PUNS (@ThePunnyWorld) October 27, 2023
36.
Hope he’s ok. pic.twitter.com/0NdpbSmBD8
— GlennyRodge (@GlennyRodge) October 26, 2023
37.
“Tell me when to stop with the gravy” pic.twitter.com/rchjfRSiYk
— ’ ♂️ (@rednuoPdnuorG) October 24, 2023
38.
— ShitpostGateway (@ShitpostGate) October 27, 2023
39.
I took a stuffed dog to the Antiques Roadshow.
The expert said, "This is very rare. Do you know what it would fetch if it was in good condition?"
I replied, "sticks or a ball I suppose?"
No you shut up
— Gwendolyn (@GLB_88) October 25, 2023
40.
My daughter just said Ross Noble looks like what would happen if you gave Robert Smith some Micellar Water. pic.twitter.com/Pdpsgl8AuH
— Hannah O'Hanrahahanrahan (@buntyhoven) October 26, 2023
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Image Wirestock on Freepik
