25 funny things we saw on Twitter this week
Welcome to our weekly coronavirus-free funny zone, courtesy of Twitter. Please exit through the gift shop, where you can buy a fancy rubber and matching pencil at a mere four times the going rate.
1.
Looks like the horse has learnt to make signs. Your move, alpacas. pic.twitter.com/IIrYfsiKbq
— John Finnemore (@JohnFinnemore) May 25, 2020
2.
God: [creates dog]
Dog: cool! What do I do now?
God: we’ll pretend that you’re mans best friend, but really your secret mission is to wait until they’re painting, then brush yourself up against it. Preferably when you’re moulting— Lydia Botters (@MrLloydSpandex) June 3, 2020
3.
Well, that Friends reunion they promised us got darker than I expected. pic.twitter.com/E4XzHesphU
— 千ㄩᗪᎶ乇ㄚ (@fudgecrumpet) June 1, 2020
4.
Those space X lads aren't due back for a while. Plenty of time for everyone to buy a gorilla suit and learn to ride a horse.
— Karl Tomlinson (@KarlT0) May 31, 2020
5.
lol in England and Wales we call it ‘biological father’. pic.twitter.com/tkUETAFQwF
— Jenny Collier (@Jenjencollier) May 30, 2020
6.
PRETEND you are Rocky Balboa by running to the Town Hall then going home and punching all the sausages in your fridge.
— trouteyes (@trouteyes) June 1, 2020
7.
The master criminal will often make one small blunder that gives them away… pic.twitter.com/pu8XsPwRjc
— G of the Bang! (@JimBlower) June 1, 2020
8.
Who can honestly say they don’t have at least two big questions about dishwasher salt?
— Daniel Maier (@danielmaier) June 3, 2020
9.
I envy conspiracy theorists, at least they think someone's in charge
— Kerry Godliman (@KerryAGodliman) June 2, 2020
10.
you're telling me a beer battered this cod?
— Alex Kealy (@alexkealy) June 4, 2020
11.
Well I didn't see that coming. pic.twitter.com/PiaD7Mt9Dl
— Nick Harvey (@mrnickharvey) June 4, 2020
12.
When you let geeks run your algorithms. pic.twitter.com/P4QwTJ67jy
— Chris Addison (@mrchrisaddison) June 4, 2020
