Our 25 Favourite Funny Tweets of the Week
It’s Friday. The weekend is so close we can smell it. It has a whiff missed opportunities and Monday dread – but that’s not your problem.
Before all that arrives, we suggest you check out the funny stuff we’ve seen on Twitter this week – and if you have an account, show your faves a bit of love.
1.
I am sure Christopher Nolan is a good guy, but if I was married to someone who made THREE whole-ass movies about a guy who throws it all away to run away with Anne Hathaway then buddy I WOULD HAVE QUESTIONS
— Sick Sad World (@YesYoureRacist) August 3, 2026
2.
— (@ceefaux) August 3, 2026
3.
joe rogan: so she broke in?
me: kind of but you have to remember this was actually common practice then
joe rogan: totally, yes. there was like a shared village mentality
me: and the owners had left porridge of varying temperatures out
joe rogan: no way. no fucking way
— Andrew Nadeau (@TheAndrewNadeau) August 6, 2026
4.
Guy that went on a japan trip 3 years ago:
Wow it's pretty humid today. You know that reminds me a lot of my trip to Osaka— zink (@alpinespirits) August 4, 2026
5.
I have a PhD in psychology and student loans, which means I can accurately diagnose my own anxiety but can't afford the therapy to fix it.
— Cooper Lawrence (@CooperLawrence) August 5, 2026
6.
Life Hack: When you really want to slap someone do it and yell "mosquito "
— Mr.Carter (@dexteristwisted) August 4, 2026
7.
Me knowing it's going to be 100° for a couple more months when I just want to wear my fall wardrobe: pic.twitter.com/zj5Pjq3n0Z
— Case (@Cactuscali19912) August 5, 2026
8.
I thought about buying that camouflage jacket
Tried it on and I couldn't see myself wearing it
— Bob Golen (@BobGolen) August 6, 2026
9.
ME: And another thing, It should be called a buycycle when it's in the shop and a bicycle when you get it home.
MY KIDNAPPER: *crying* Omg we let you go two hours ago
— FᎪᎢ ᏩᎪNᎠᎪᏞF (@sofarrsogud) August 4, 2026
10.
I was thinking of having a tattoo for my birthday. I'm veey keen on bagpipes, but I'm not sure my garden is big enough.
— Miss Ally (@MissAlly_01) August 4, 2026
11.
— Papa Woof und Krampus und Bleaken (@woofknight) August 1, 2026
12.
— Moose Allain Ꙭ (@MooseAllain) August 4, 2026