News p.3

The RNLI has warned volunteers not to wear its branded clothing because of threats from far right idiots, and it’s a terrifying, depressing sign of the times

Donald Trump and “Sleepy” Joe Biden both attended 9/11 anniversary events, but only one of them could stay awake, and the side-by-side comparison is brutal

Nigel Farage just laughed as female protestors at the Reform UK conference were violently manhandled by elderly party members

People are furiously calling out the hypocrisy and double standards around the treatment of balaclava-wearing ‘Stop the Boats’ protestors in Dover

Nadine Dorries and Laila Cunningham gave competing trainwreck interviews defending Reform UK’s funding, and honestly it’s hard to pick which is the more excruciating to watch

Humour vacuum JD Vance attempted a joke about hanging out with Joe Biden at the 9/11 anniversary, and if possible it’s made him even more unlikeable and unpopular

Nigel Farage said he’d declare a “national emergency” and make Parliament sit 24 hours a day if Reform UK are elected, and people were quick to point out a few flaws in his plan

This die-hard supporter saying Donald Trump freed America from Great Britain’s rule shone a light into one ear of the MAGA skull, and it came straight out the other

Pete Hegseth is reportedly thinking of running for President in 2028 – 18 people drinking in the glorious comic potential of his campaign

American kids learn the names of the Great Lakes with the acronym ‘HOMES’, so renaming Lake Ontario will be a self-own for the ages

Donald Trump is apparently going to skip the 25th anniversary of 9/11 at Ground Zero because he’s not allowed to give a speech, and people are insulted but honestly also relieved

Donald Trump posted an AI video of him showing George Washington around his precious ballroom if you’re wondering what’s on (what’s left of) his mind

Reform UK threw a ‘Farage Fest’ celebration party that looked more Wonkaland than Glastonbury – 16 intergalactically brutal reviews

UK AI Minister Kanishka Narayan released a video bigging up “British AI”, but sadly for him (and for us), the real story was in the background

Count Binface had the perfect devastating response when Nigel Farage had the cheek to say he’d “beaten the Establishment candidate” in Clacton